GREGG K. KAKESAKO / GKAKESAKO@STARBULLETIN.COM
Wives of Marines deploying to Iraq met yesterday at the personnel services agency at Kaneohe Bay. From left are Julie Aycock, Janelle Kennedy, Melinda Patton, Beth Weber with 1-year-old daughter Kirstin, and Melissa Weaver, who is expecting her first child in two weeks.
Marine wives
form help networkVolunteers provide support for
families with dads off to war
Marine Gunnery Sgt. George Patton will miss his son's 11th birthday in June, as he has for the past 10 years.
Wife Melinda Patton said it's a tough time for their son, Hunter, "but he's a tough little guy. He's a real trouper. He's beginning to see what his dad does."
Melissa Weaver, 26, has been married for a little more than a year; most of the time, her husband, Cpl. Joshua Weaver, has been away at war. Now with a baby girl due in two weeks, Joshua Weaver will again deploy to Iraq this month with members of the 3rd Radio Battalion.
Melissa Weaver and Melinda Patton are among a dozen "key volunteers" at the Marine Corps Base in Kaneohe who provide help and information for spouses left behind when their husbands deploy.
"Things always break when a spouse is on deployment," said Patton. "That's anything from cars to washing machines. It never fails."
This network of volunteer spouses serves as a sounding and resource board for those in "the rear area," said Lt. Col. Mark Aycock, commander of the 3rd Radio Battalion.
The Iraq deployment for the 3rd Radio Battalion could last six to eight months. The Kaneohe Marines will provide communications support for the 1st Marine Expeditionary Force from Camp Pendleton in California. They will be part of a 25,000-person Marine Corps air and ground force that will replace Army troops that will have been in Iraq for more than a year.
Last year, 200 Marines from the same unit, which was then designated as the 1st Radio Battalion, spent eight months in Kuwait and Iraq. Fifty of those 200 Marines, including Aycock, will return to Iraq.
Aycock said key volunteers help the Marine "stay focused on his or her mission."
He said that it's hard for Marines at war to keep up with their mission if they are worried whether the bills are being paid at home or if there is someone sick who needs care.
Weaver, a 1995 graduate of Konawaena High School, said it took a while to get over the "cultural shock" of being married to a Marine.
"Just having him away," Weaver said, "was a cultural shock."
Angela Reed, information referral specialist at Kaneohe Bay, said the Marine Corps provides what it calls MCC One Source to help spouses left behind with information from running a household to coping with feelings of stress and anxiety.
"There is a 1-800 number that a person can call at any time," Reed said, "and someone is there to help them find the right answers."
One-third of the 150 Marines going to Iraq are married, Aycock said.
He said his wife, a former Marine, always takes care of things when he is away. "When I am forward, I don't have to worry about any problems at home."
Patton said the "key volunteers" also hold small weekly prayer groups.
"There's anywhere from five to 25 people who meet in the chapel every week," she said. "Some people pray, others just sit and then we get together afterwards."
"The Marine Corps is just not a unit -- a band of brothers," Aycock said, "but it's a family."
