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Press Box Dave Reardon |
‘Miracle’ is filled
with clichesIs America really ready for a middle-aged Kurt Russell in plaid pants?
If the goal of "Miracle" is to make those of us who remember the United States hockey team's unlikely gold-medal-winning performance in the 1980 Olympics feel old, it succeeds. This time capsule that opens at theaters today is full of shaggy haircuts, late-model sedans in long gas lines and references to the Iran hostage crisis (remember when we had the Ayatollah to hate instead of Saddam and bin Laden?).
It fails if the idea is to remind us of or offer some real insight as to how the good guy amateurs from America beat the bad guy pros from Russia and the rest of the Eastern Bloc. (It really did happen.) Early on there is lots of talk about style of play, about beating the Russkis at their own game. But we never really see that develop. We eventually get to see a lot of checking, hallmark of the brutish North American game that coach Herb Brooks (Russell's character) actually put aside to teach "the boys" European finesse.
If historical inaccuracy in the name of better body-crunching action doesn't light your lamp, how about a truckload of sports cliches?
First there's the old team-building theme. The Why Can't We All Just Get Along song is tired enough already. But here the major differences are between white guys from Boston and white guys from Minnesota who have to beef out their differences and old grudges before they can play together for the red, white and blue. (At the end of the film, their "diversity" is celebrated.)
Then there's the coachaholic angle. Can there ever be a sports movie where the nurturer of young athletes is not the head of a dysfunctional household?
For additional side dishes, we have Tough Coach Molds Individuals Into Team, Tough Coach Has To Cut Nice Guy Who Tried Hard, and Tough Coach Goes Against Establishment. Wash it down best you can with Angelic Americans Conquer Evil Russians.
Maybe I'm too cynical. And this movie is great for kids. It will be a fine choice for a family rental in a few weeks.
But for me, the biggest miracle about "Miracle" is that I was able to sit through the entire thing without falling asleep or leaving the theater.
There might be some suspense for those under 30. But one of the problems with sports movies about things that have really happened is that we know the ending. And one of the reasons we love sports is precisely the opposite: Because we never know what the conclusion will be -- unless, of course, we live in Hawaii and fail to walk around all day with ear plugs on.
In some ways, "Miracle" is like "The Rookie." Both are fact-is-stranger-than-fiction stories. But where "The Rookie" was endearing in concept and conclusion with bearable back stories, 'Miracle' meandered and grated.
Now the good stuff:
>> Lots of people in this movie talked like they did in "Fargo."
>> The guy who played Jim Craig looks just like the real Jim Craig.
>> You get real commentary from Al Michaels.
But overall, "The Miracle on Ice" -- which many consider the greatest upset in sports history -- deserves much better.
And Kurt Russell wearing reading glasses instead of the Snake Plisskin eye patch is about as congruous as a Zamboni cruising down Waikiki Beach.
See the Columnists section for some past articles.
Dave Reardon, who covered sports in Hawaii from 1977 to 1998,
moved to the the Gainesville Sun, then returned to
the Star-Bulletin in Jan. 2000.
E-mail him at dreardon@starbulletin.com