You've lived by the Golden Rule since you were 5: Treat others the way you want to be treated. This is all about modifying your behavior and employing common courtesy in the community. Makes sense — when you're 5.

As you got involved in the business world, you learned the Platinum Rule: Treat people the way THEY want to be treated. This is the next level of communication, and requires some intuition, people reading, and adapting.

While it may be slightly uncomfortable at times, when you follow this rule, and you really treat people according to their preferred communication code (not your own), you'll gain influence as you instantly build rapport.

Now, the Diamond Rule: Engage with people through participation, getting them to interact with you. Listen to what their needs, wants and desires are instead of providing a one-size-fits-all — which we all know is never true.

Once your prospects begin interacting with you, you'll gain their trust, devotion, and loyalty.

When someone follows you on Twitter or comments on your blog, celebrate! This is one of the easiest ways you can discover his/her unique Influence Code. Look for key indicators in the words used, and the way their communication is structured.

Control their perception of you by using these influence codes:

>> The Driver Code: If her communication is direct, asking about results, etc., reply in kind. Get to the point. When engaging with the Driver, do not reply with lengthy paragraphs and stories. Answer questions directly. If she likes what she hears, she'll make an immediate decision to do business with you. She's all about results and efficiency. Don't waste her time and she'll be a raving fan.

» The Influencer Code: His communication is wordy, very friendly, or uses lots of exclamation points after every sentence. This is one of the strongest communication codes, and can work to your advantage. Be friendly, personable, and engaging. Don't get into a lot of details. Instead, provide a bulleted list of benefits or a video for using your product. Influence the Influencer, and you'll open the flood gates of prosperity to your business.

» The Steady Code: Her communication is lengthy. She seeks lots of information from you. Be warm and conversational. She feels good when she's listened to. She wants to get to know the person behind the product. Provide lots of pictures of you, your company, and smiling, raving fans using your product.

» The Compliant Code: His communication is precise, asking for data, proof and research to support your claims. Stick to the facts, and comply with the rules of your industry; dot your i's and cross your t's, and you'll impress him. Testimonials with specific, quantifiable numbers are critical to breaking through his skeptical barriers.

Remember, one size does not fit all! A custom-tailored suit will always look and feel better.

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Deborah Cole Micek is a business coach at RPM Success Group Inc. She can be reached at .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address).