SPEWING HUMOR

The air is thick with Scottish wit

The volcanic ash that shut airports throughout the United Kingdom, Ireland and northern Europe did not tame the dry British humor. Some comments by online readers of the Edinburgh Scotsman:

» “;This is all the fault of Westminster and the Union, and could never have happened in an 'independent' Scotland.”;

» “;Breaking news!

In a desperate bid to engage voters and soak up extra votes, three main parties have all issued action plans to combat volcanic disruption:

Labor: 'We will ban volcanos.'

Liberal Dems: 'We will tax any particles of ash flying over the U.K.'

Conservatives: 'We will encourage the ash to move in a more efficient manner towards mainland Europe.'

The SNP (Scottish National Party) were unavailable for comment, but are expected to demand that volcanic responsibilities be devolved to the Scottish Parliament.”;

CROCS ROCK

Stepping up to a new market

Crocs. Love 'em or leave 'em, there's no denying that the rubbery footwear once was a hot, hot, hot fad.

More than 120 million pairs have been sold since the brand's 2002 launch. Now, after a public cooling-off period, Crocs is set to re-enter the marketplace with reimagined styles, including strappy red high heels, right. Aiming to become a “;brand for the ages,”; Crocs is hoping consumers will again, snap it all up.

NATIVE THEMES

Hawaiian films headline inaugural festival

Native Hawaiian filmmakers will have a major showcase as the Doris Duke Theatre at the Honolulu Academy of Arts hosts its first 'Oiwi Film Festival from May 1-26. Among the films making their Hawaii premieres are “;Release our Water,”; decrying the diversion of water from East Maui Stream, in a region where more than half the population is native Hawaiian, to Upcountry and central Maui. It will screen May 14, 15 and 16, paired with another sovereignty film, “;Noho Hewa: The Wrongful Occupation of Hawaii,”; which was first released in 2008. For more information, see honoluluacademy.org.