Christmas Furlough Friday song

(Sung to the tune of 'Frosty the Snowman')

Furloughs on Fridays, what a jolly good idea,
Now our budget's made 'cause we don't get paid,
No more red ink to be cleared.

Furloughs on Fridays, what a giant can of worms!
We all thought it worked, but we look like jerks,
Now just watch as we all squirm!

There must have been some contraband
In that eggnog that we drank,
'Cause when the kukai hit the fan,
Everyone began to stank!

Oh, Furloughs on Fridays, so much worry and concern,
But the children know that we love them so,
What a harsh lesson to learn.

Thumpety-thump-thump, Thumpety-thump-thump,
We need a pot of gold.
Bumpety-bump-bump, Bumpety-bump-bump,
Even Mufi can't fix this road!

———
By Matt Nakamura of Honolulu

Choo Choo (Sung to the tune of 'Santa Claus is Coming to Town')

(Refrain:)

Oh, you better watch out
You better not pout
You better not cry
I'm telling you why
The choo-choo train is coming to town

It cares not where you're sleeping
It will probably keep you awake
It rises to majestic heights
So do the studies, for goodness sake

(Repeat refrain)

It will cost a few billion bucks
It will look like hell on wheels
It will avoid the population centers
So beware of shady deals

(Repeat refrain)

It will create a chaotic mess
It will make us all depressed
If you think that there is traffic now
Then you ain't seen anything yet

(Repeat refrain)

It will be rail road-ed in
It will make the unions rich
It will boost the mayor's gov coffers
Indeed that would be a sin

(Repeat refrain)

We must plan to design the best
We must strengthen our resolve
We must prevent a disastrous route
By voting hard rail out

Oh, you better watch out
You better not pout
You better not cry
I'm telling you why
The choo-choo train is coming to town

———
By Fredrica ‘Ricki’ Cassiday of Honolulu