“;Stop hassling me, the presses are rolling right now, as I'm talking to you, at Trade Publishing, between Republican and Democrat streets in Kalihi,”; insisted Ron Jacobs.

I'd called Jacobs to find out why I hadn't yet gotten a copy of “;Obamaland,”; his definitive account of Barack Obama's growing up on the mean streets of Makiki and the basketball courts of Punahou.

Jacobs, you may remember, has been laboring on his “;transmedia assemblage”; of a book since long before it was clear Obama would cinch the nomination, much less the presidency.

“;It's been half-printed, but we had to wait to get all the Christmas 2008 stuff in,”; Jacobs said. He's already getting orders from all over the world, perhaps because the book includes contributions from Academy Award-winner Cameron Crowe and Pulitzer Prize-winner David Maraniss. It also includes maps of Obama sites and rare photos, like the one above, never before published.

Its publication may set off some controversy in Hawaii, especially the memoir “;Buff 'N' Blu & Black”; from Joelle Edwards, the only other black student at Punahou during Obama's time - before she left for Kaiser to escape the racism she experienced there. Edwards was cited in a recent New York Times piece about racism at Punahou, occasioned last month by Obama's playing basketball at his alma mater.

To get Jacobs off the phone, I had to promise I'd mention that if you order the book before its official release date, Jan. 20, Inauguration Day, from whodaguyhawaii.com, you get shipping free.

Yes We Can, Maybe

“;We were very disappointed,”; says Sarah Ulis, president of the Hawaii State Society of Washington, D.C., when she learned that Obama would attend the recently created, by-invite-only Home States Inaugural Ball rather than the society's long-planned and sold-out Hawaii inaugural gala.

“;We have high hopes he might still come, because our ball has generated so much buzz, here and in Hawaii,”; she says. “;Besides, ours is better.”;

It's not just the entertainment - Eddie Kamae, Raiatea Helm and so forth. “;Inaugural balls have a bad reputation for having to stand in line to pay for food and drink,”; says Ulis. The Hawaii ball has an open bar with special American Dream cocktails, not to mention Cherry Blossom princesses passing out fresh floral lei to all 1,000 guests.

“;I suppose the other balls are good, because they give more people a chance to sample the aloha,”; says Ulis, “;but ours is the truest representation of Hawaii.”;

Like Beef?

Talked to Amir Abrahim, who's in town from New York to open Wolfgang Steakhouse in the Royal Hawaiian Center. (If you're curious about the name, he's Egyptian-American. “;Come see me,”; he says. “;I walk like an Egyptian.”;)

In his short time here, Abrahim has concluded, “;This is a beautiful town. Now all I need to do is make $20 million a year here so I can stay.”;

Wolfgang Steakhouse has two Manhattan locations created by Wolfgang Zweiner, a retired head waiter at the legendary Peter Luger's, where my Brooklyn grandfather used to take me if I'd been good.

Is Abrahim worried about opening a pricey steakhouse in the middle of a recession? “;We have our own concept,”; he says, including a porterhouse steak for four. “;If you come here, you won't stop for a sandwich on the way home.”;

He promises a gala opening by Valentine's Day, which would be nice since what we've had lately is restaurant closings.

Double The Trouble

Mona Wood, who functions as Dog Chapman's local publicist, a challenging task, is back from Vegas, where she did two improbable things. One, win a little money. And, two, end up backstage at the Carrot Top show, where she reports the odd-looking, red-haired comedian “;is actually pretty normal.”;

Turns out Carrot Top is a big Dog fan. Wood put him in touch, and as soon as he gets a break, the comic is going to fly out and do a “;Dog the Bounty Hunter”; episode. If you see him and Dog coming (and how could you not spot them?), I advise you to run.

biting resolutions

Celebrity dentist Russell Masunaga (”;The Whole Tooth,”; KHVH, Saturdays) didn't get his New Year's resolution into last week's column, as he was bouncing back from surgery.

His turns out to be an admonition anyway: “;Take care of your dental health.”; Dentists all say the same thing, I said.

Masunaga laughed: “;My accountant asked today whether I was following his advice. For every dollar I made, was I setting aside a dollar for taxes? No. So I asked him, 'Do you floss every day?' No. We all have our failings.”;

Buried Treasures

If you're at the Academy of Arts, make sure to see a little exhibit called “;Graphic Cabinet 2: Face to Face.”; In addition to the singularly uninformative title, the Academy hid this show in a tiny room behind the Impressionist paintings.

Hanging on the walls are original prints of photographs you've only seen in books: Karsch, Weegee, Weston, Mapplethorpe, Robert Frank, Sally Mann. The Academy won't have them up long, only until Feb. 22. They fade in the light.

Canned Response

Workers at Hormel's plant in Austin, Minn., got Christmas and New Year's off. Hawaii residents may be happy to learn that the plant has otherwise been working two shifts, seven days a week.

Why? They're turning out a record 149,950 cans of SPAM per shift, to meet escalating demand.

Apparently, hard economic times are good for the “;gorgeous pink”; loaves of spiced ham, pork and potato starch. So, no matter how badly 2009 turns out, you'll be able to get a SPAM musubi.

John Heckathorn is editor of Hawaii Magazine and director of integrated media for the aio Group.