Have you ever had a date that was so unusual you've never forgotten it? Three stand out in my mind:

» An East-West Center grantee from Africa hired me to do some library research. After I'd spent four hours at the library and then handed him the results, he asked me out to dinner at, of all places, McCully Chop Suey.

It was nothing fancy, that's for sure, but I happily perused the menu. When the waitress came to take our order, my date immediately said we would have ONE plate lunch and two forks. The waitress shot me a condescending look, and I nearly died of embarrassment. Talk about chintzy!

When we finished, he drove to his friend's apartment. I listened to them chat for what seemed an eternity. He then took me home and made a confession: He didn't really need an employee; he wanted a girlfriend—that is, me. Needless to say, after that lousy dinner, I turned him down.

» Another unusual date began on the bus. A guy in his late 20s sat next to me and struck up a conversation. He was engaging enough that when he asked for my phone number, I gave it to him, then got off the bus near my home.

He later called and asked me to an outdoor concert. The catch was he didn't own a car, so he told me to take the 5:30 p.m. bus at my stop in Manoa, and he would board it at his stop near the university.

Sure enough, we rendezvoused on the bus. He was carrying a bottle of wine, wrapped in a towel. We got off, listened to the concert and returned home the same way—he to the university and I to Manoa. That was our first and last date, because we just didn't click.

» Finally, I must tell you about the local guy who proposed to me by mail while a student on the mainland. He wrote, “;I have thought it over and have concluded that you should become my wife. Please call me collect with your answer.”;

What a horrible, unromantic way to propose marriage! I decided not to call. Instead, I wrote back that he had not mentioned the word “;love”; in his letter and, therefore, I was declining his proposal, wishing him all the best.

You probably have your own memories of bad or unusual dates, but these are the ones I'll never forget. I thank God for David, who always ordered two dinners for us at elegant restaurants, who owned a car and who swiftly bought me a diamond ring the day after we decided to get married. Life has been sweet for both of us.