Some customs travel well, some don't. Take the pop-culture regalia of Christmas—sleigh bells, snow, fluffy fir Christmas trees and so on. They make about as much sense in Hawaii as hula dancers in Anchorage, but since hula is alive and well in Anchorage, we know it's the thought that counts. And so, Christmas trees make an appearance in tropical Hawaii every December.

It doesn't have to make sense. No cultural imperative or marketing ploy really has to. People want trees, they get trees, and they are imported from the mainland (except during December 1941, when a Japanese submarine sank the freighter carrying Hawaii's tree supply). Notwithstanding local tree suppliers like Helemano Farms in Wahiawa, most cut trees arrive trussed up in containers, and it's an annual holiday tradition for Department of Agriculture inspectors to shake a few and count the number of bugs and slugs that tumble out.

But maybe you're past the point of erecting the drying corpse of a severed fir in your living room, or you're out of room, or you simply want to try something different. No fair simply hanging one upside down: That just says you wish you were Australian.

We have a viral e-mail DIY of how to create a “;redneck Christmas tree”; out of Mountain Dew cans, and it looks surprisingly good. Start drinking six cans of Mountain Dew every day between now and Christmas 2009 and you just might have enough.

We brainstormed some more alternatives to the traditional tree:

Artificial trees: They're beginning to look pretty good, and the business seems to have been co-opted by electronics manufacturers like GE, with pre-wired lighting and even rotating bases. They can easily cost up to $300, but hey, they'll last for years, and if you want your tree to look exactly the same every year, it'll save you money. The newer ones feature LED lighting, which has a lower energy footprint.

Art tree: A spinoff of artificial trees. A fake tree can be excessively and wonderfully decorated thanks to dime-store geegaws and a hot-glue gun. It becomes an instant heirloom that you can only handle once a year, like that first sip of eggnog. The example shown here was created by the late Star-Bulletin editorial contributor Arnold Van Fossen.

Let's get small: Hawaii probably has more bonsai trees per capita than anywhere outside of Little Tokyo, so why not lavish them with tiny balls and teensy decorations? Talk about East meets West! Itty-bitty decorations can be found at craft stores like Ben Franklin and FloraDec, and remember, with bonsai, less is more. Of course, when it comes to presents under the tree, more will be from Zales than Schwinn.

A live tree: Plant a living fir in a pot or in your yard. As the tree gets bigger, buy more decorations.

Inflatable tree: Yes, they make them, for when the shape is all that matters—and no needle mess. They are unlikely to catch fire, although stringing lights upon them might cause melt-holes and a sadly flattened centerpiece come Christmas morning. Handy in a flood, though.

Hanging tree: A tree can be created as a wall hanging out of felt and such, with ornaments pinned to it. And then it's rolled up in the attic the other 11 months of the year.

Stand-ins: There's a whole world of green things out there. Try another plant. How about ginger? Plumeria? Ti? Poinsettia? Tumbleweeds? Or maybe bamboo, which you can recycle as kadomatsu a week later?

Use your imagination. If that fails, there's always the Festivus pole from “;Seinfeld.”; It's an aluminum pole with nothing on it, for the minimalist. Little about the holiday season is minimalist, but you have to start somewhere.