With elections closing in and politics on everyone's mind, I knew it was just a matter of time before I heard from Moniker Mot. Or is it Memoir Knot? Momento Irk? Oh yeah, Mike Morton. Morton is Hawaii's self-appointed King of Anagrams. He likes to mix up all the letters of people's names, especially politicians, and see if they can be reformed into an amusing, ironic, insightful or even inciteful phrase.

With anagrams, you have to juggle ALL the letters in a word to make new words, like I did with Mike's name up there. It is amazing how many of the phrases that result from this linguistic Cuisinaire actually seem to apply to the person whose name is being spindled and mutilated. Mike Morton, for instance, really is a Moniker Mot. He sent me some anagrams for his current favorite subject, John McCain's VP choice, Sarah Palin, and the results are kind of disturbing.

Mix up “;Governor Sarah Palin”; and you come up with “;An evil pagan's horror.”; “;Vice President Sarah Palin”; becomes “;Evil Saracen! Depart in ship!”; or “;Partisan Pinhead is clever!”; (Anagramists are allowed to add their own punctuation.) “;President Sarah Palin”; rescrambles as the chilling “;Tehran plan is: Despair.”;

I came up with some anagrams (with the help of the Internet) for the Alaskan governor that were a bit more positive. “;Sarah Palin,”; for instance, becomes “;A sharp nail”; or “;Ah, slap Iran!”; But “;VP Sarah Palin”; transforms to “;VIP a rash plan”; in the letter scramble.

  I wondered what anagrams would reveal about other political figures. “;John McCain”; doesn't offer much more than “;Cinch! Jam on!”; But “;Pres. John McCain”; becomes “;Jr. son? Nice champ!”; Or the less friendly “;Scram! PC Johnnie!”; “;Senator John McCain”; mixes up even worse as “;John a miscreant con.”;

In line with the Democratic presidential candidate's sophisticated style of dressing, “;President Barack Obama”; reveals “;Dreamboat bearskin cap!”; But when you add his middle name, “;Barack Hussein Obama”; becomes the curious “;Habeas-corpus bearskin emit DNA!”; or the more curious “;Habeas-corpus deerskin bait man.”;

Interestingly, “;Joe Biden”; simply reveals “;I need job!”;

Our current president doesn't do well in anagramland. “;George Bush”; becomes “;Bugger Hose”; or “;Surge bog, he.”; And “;President George Bush”; becomes “;Brought depress genie.”;

I looked up some anagrams for local politicos and discovered “;Mayor Mufi Hannemann”; unscrambles as “;Main fun? Hammer, annoy!”; And an apparent reference to his mayoral opponent, “;Mufi Hannemann”; becomes “;Him fun, Ann mean!”;

“;Ann Kobayashi”; translates to the playful “;I shy banana, OK?”; While “;Mayor Ann Kobayashi”; becomes the mystical observation “;Mynah abrasion okay.”;

Not to be left out, I grinded myself in the word blender and “;Charles Memminger”; became “;Mr. Cashmere Mingle”; and “;Slammin' cheer germ!”; That's me all over, itch, and I am contagious.