Weekly Eater Nadine Kam

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Nice to look at, but ...

Faux-Chinese food at PF Chang's can't compare to the real thing

PF CHANG'S CHINA BISTRO

Hokua, 1288 Ala Moana Blvd. / 596-4710

I GREW UP in the melting pot called Waipahu, where I had a lot of exposure to American, Filipino, Japanese and Chinese cuisines, plus, during one particularly memorable Spanish class, homemade tamales. I've never had a better tamale since then.

It never occurred to me then that others were not getting similar exposure. It's only as an adult that I started to meet these others, now living with arrested culinary development. I'd have to think twice about eating insects and certain kinds of offal that are standard fare in other parts of the world, but there are other food biases and obsessions I find confounding, like some individuals' inability to stomach vegetables.

I was surprised when one local woman told me she had never eaten dim sum, one of the basic food groups to me. Then I met a man who said he never eats in Chinatown because it's "too dirty." For him the outdoors is also too dirty.

WHEN I heard that P.F. Chang's China Bistro was coming, I was perplexed. Why would anyone bring pseudo-Chinese food to a landscape already saturated with the real thing? But, as I've suggested, not everyone would recognize or care about the difference, as long as they can sit in a beautiful, clean and air-conditioned room with a full bar. The restaurant will also find an audience among those who moved here from the mainland, for whom local-style Chinese fare might seem odd after growing up with P.F. Chang's.

The restaurant is well positioned on the ground floor of the new Hokua luxury condominium. Those who would spend $1 million on a condo just might be the sort who don't appreciate surly waiters or chair-to-chair contact associated with humbler dining rooms.

P.F. Chang is easily the most beautiful and stylish of the Western chain restaurants to have opened here this year. The dark interior is done up in a mix of wood, slate and dyed concrete, with an open kitchen highlighted overhead by a mural depicting 12th-century China. Stylish flourishes carry over to waiters mixing their special mustard-chili sauce for you at the table where a plain old jar of yellow mustard just won't do. It's too peasant in a place like this, where you'll have to pay for tea.

THE MENU is as vast as the room, so you'll have to make some tough decisions. I can make it slightly easier for you by banishing the shrimp dumplings ($8.25). Texturally, the dumplings were rubbery. Flavor-wise, they were only a slightly better than the bland frozen variety, though this might appeal to those who cannot stomach the flavors of ginger, green onions and cilantro.

Although P.F. Chang's makes a big deal about its wok cooking, there's a lot of handling and marinating that adds up to overkill. Nearly every dish I tried was salted to death, then cooked a little too long.

If the Northern-style spare ribs ($8.50) seemed to fare well, it could have been because they were first to arrive. Marinated in soy sauce and star anise with a touch of ginger, these could be addictive to those who love char siu. To add more emphasis, the ribs are accompanied by a dish of five-spice salt for sprinkling as you please.

Kung Pao Chicken is never as spicy as it could be, so I gave P.F.'s a try. I liked this dish, although a little of its lacquered, candied saltiness goes a long way. In Szechuan style, the dry-fried mahogany chicken ($13.25) was crisp outside and tender inside, tossed with peanuts and whole chili peppers.

Of course, the fusion operation wouldn't be complete without borrowing from its Southeast Asia neighbors, as in a dish of Coconut Curry Vegetables ($8.50), a stir-fried mix of bok choy, carrots, onions, broccoli, mushrooms, tofu, peanuts and snap peas.

The priciest items are the meat and seafood entrees, ranging from $13.95 to $20.95, and meant to be individual, rather than family-style dishes. Wok-seared lamb ($14.50) was another overmarinated, overcooked dish that I might have enjoyed if it hadn't been burnt. Oolong-marinated sea bass ($20.95) was a ringer for soy-marinated butterfish. I had no trouble enjoying this dish, even without the tea flavor. You'd have better luck with the tea-smoked chicken at Glowing Dragon in Chinatown.

For dessert, the Great Wall of Chocolate ($7.95) lives up to its name. Its six layers are enough to feed four, the last layer frosted and pressed with semisweet chocolate chips.

P.F. Chang's convenience and vast menu might make it worth an occasional visit, but I'll get my real Chinese fix elsewhere.