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COURTESY MICHELLE TAMAYOSE Michelle Tamayose made a trip to Okinawa where she saw her cousin Chiemi who she last saw in 1981, when this photo was taken. Chiemi is at left with Tamayose.

Okinawan trip with mom
shows kindness is still alive

I LONG HAD a desire to return to Okinawa to see my aunts, uncles and cousins who took care of me as a child, while my mother, who suffers from severe rheumatoid arthritis, quietly let her hopes of ever returning slowly slip away as her once strong body grew weaker. It had been 24 years since my mom and I last saw many of her relatives in Okinawa City.

Recently, I decided we needed to make this trip happen. I celebrated my 30th birthday this year and overcame many personal challenges. This family reunion was an event I wanted for myself and for my mother.

With the permission of my mom's doctor, travel plans were made quickly. On March 16 (a day after my mom's 65th birthday) we left Hawaii to reunite with family. We were excited but nervous. We were told to be prepared for the island's many physical changes, and I thought about our own changes that our family would also need to be prepared for.

The plane ride and layover was a lengthy 14 hours, but airport and airline staffers were helpful in assisting us. At Okinawa's Naha airport, we were greeted by my aunty Miko, cousins Chiemi and Taiki and his friends. They gave us leis and big hugs. I touched Chiemi's face, reminding myself that the last time I did that I was just a little girl. She is now a mother of three, but she held me with the same tight embrace she did when she said goodbye 24 years ago.

THE TRIP WAS full of reunions and explorations of familiar and not-so-familiar places. Taiki and his taiko (drum) and eisa (dance) group took us on a two-day tour of the island and threw a welcome party for us. Here we were, an audience of three, watching 35 family and friends entertain us with dances and song. They pulled me up to dance with them, and my clumsy feet weren't a concern. Everyone's energy kept me going.

I was extremely touched by their love and generosity. I saw the strength and energy in my mother from the happiness and care that others extended to us.

Family and friends would touch my mom's hands, now deformed from arthritis, and cry. They were not afraid to address the issues of my mother's physical challenges or express concern and curiosity. I was different, too, no longer a little child, but an adult who had been crushed by too many people's pessimism and selfishness over time.

I found myself crying many times because the people on this trip reminded me that there still is an immense amount of kindness in this world.

My Okinawan family spoke passionately about their daily lives and had a common philosophy about living with their hearts full and without fear. They were honest with their emotions, appreciated good food and kept connected to their community and the environment.

I came home wanting to share what my family taught me. It is to trust my faith in the goodness of people and to live with the awareness and appreciation of the power of the beautiful human spirit.

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