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Princesses come
Last summer, I started calling my daughter Mikaela my "mocha girl" because her skin tanned so beautifully. Little did I know, this moniker did not sit well her. One night she said to me, "I don't want to be a mocha girl." |
It was official. My daughter was suffering from the dreaded "I, Princess" syndrome.
It starts when a girl is born and is automatically elevated to princess status by her proud parents. Princess merchandise quickly finds its way to the nursery in the form of pink princess-inspired pajamas, dresses and even diaper pants. As a girl grows, she becomes fully aware of her princess-ness, and the regal accoutrements multiply like rabbits on speed. The crib gives way to a bed with a princess canopy. Birthday and Christmas presents consist of princess dolls, dress-up kits, books, DVDs, even royally endowed bicycles and scooters.
Mikaela has been a princess for five years now. It doesn't matter that neither parent is descended from royalty; she is a princess, and woe to the fool who would dare dispute this claim. (Actually, her daddy counts first-century King William the Conqueror as his ancestor. But, the passage of time has greatly diluted his royal blood quantum.)
I CAN SAFELY blame my husband for feeding our daughter the princess propaganda. Bill had long harbored a deep-seated desire to father a little princess. When Mikaela was born, he was the first to address her as The Princess. So it is only fair that when Mikaela wants the latest princess merchandise on the market, I tell her to ask her daddy.
The origins of the "I, Princess" syndrome can be traced to the hallowed halls of Disney, home of Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Belle and Jasmine. In recent years the savvy marketing minds at Disney have developed a new princess "brand" by combining the princess characters and plastering their pictures on all sorts of pink-hued products that cost parents beaucoup bucks.
Economic implications aside, the "I, Princess" syndrome can play upon the psyche of an impressionable young girl. Mikaela once lamented that her hair wasn't "yellow like Cinderella." My daughter, whose hapa-haole hair has garnered compliments from strangers, feels she lacks the proper pigmentation in her follicles. She also wonders why her eyes are not blue, and how could Prince Charming fall in love with a brown-eyed girl? (I don't know about Prince Charming, but I know Van Morrison had no problem singing about HIS brown-eyed girl back in the day.)
Bill and his dad tried their best to get Mikaela to see that princesses come in different colors. My father-in-law, bless his heart, once bought Mikaela the African-American version of Barbie of Swan Lake. When Mikaela opened the ethnically inspired gift, she looked confused, then put brown Barbie on the side and searched for the "real" Barbie of Swan Lake -- you know -- the blond hair, blue-eyed version.
Bill wasn't very successful in his attempt to give his daughter a different princess perspective. When the movie "Mulan" came out of DVD, Bill bought it for Mikaela. He excitedly told Mikaela that they would watch the movie together, with popcorn and soda! His goal was to get Mikaela in touch with her Chinese heritage by showing her a movie about a strong Chinese girl. About 20 minutes into the movie, Mikaela wandered out of the TV room.
"Why aren't you watching 'Mulan' with Daddy?" I asked. "Mulan is not a REAL princess," Mikaela declared before trouncing off to her room to commune with her blond hair, blue-eyed princess dolls.
For now, I will indulge my daughter's desire to live in an all-princess, all-the-time world. When she's older, I will explain that "happily ever after" is just a fairy tale and that a real Prince Charming might come in the form of an accountant whose idea of excitement is striving to create meaningful subsidiary ledgers. I will tell Mikaela that true love takes time and is hard work. And I will continue to tell her that it doesn't matter what color her hair, eyes or skin are, she is beautiful inside and out. That is the measure of a true princess.