Bad social situations
can bring out the
worst in people

Specific examples are that assertive people are always likely to speak out in public, and that altruistic people will always volunteer for community service activities.

The facts are that people are extremely sensitive to the social situations in which they find themselves and make adjustments in their everyday behaviors.

People who are very confident about their public speaking skills, and who are known to be good leaders, may be relatively quiet in certain social situations. They may be at meetings with younger colleagues who need more first-hand experience in communicating their points. The leaders may decide to remain silent and let the younger employees make presentations and field questions. Leaders know that if they are the only attendees at the meeting who speak up, subordinates will not develop their skills.

Or, confident and knowledgeable people may defer to someone with recognized credentials.

I was involved recently in a project where one person formulated specific goals and acquired the necessary funding to carry out his plans. Twelve highly verbal individuals deferred to this person. They accepted his leadership because they felt he had the responsibility of communicating his wishes to those who agreed to help him with the project.

The fact that people can adjust to various social situations explains why they can accomplish so much. They can achieve various goals because they are able to behave differently at different times.

During the same day people can make sales calls, give constructive feedback to a subordinate, attend a Bible study group, and can discuss algebra homework with their teenage children. They behave differently and in doing so demonstrate the range of human potential.

Unfortunately, situations can be bad and many people adjust to them. Bad situations suck in good people and encourage them to engage in behaviors that are ethically troublesome.

In Hawaii, for example, there has long been the practice of giving campaign donations in the hopes of receiving government contracts at a later date.

Further, as MidWeek columnist Larry Price points out, people are supposed to accept the absurdity that engineers and architects give to campaigns and expect nothing in return. This is a bad situation. Good people, both donors and politicians, are stuck in a situation that draws out the worst in them.

One of many signs that people are facing bad situations is that there is a special language that people use to discuss their behavior.

In the campaign contribution case, phrases like "we have always done it this way" or "bundle money from different employees and relatives" are used. At times, the communication is non-verbal. Politicians don't explicitly say that government contracts will be forthcoming. But the smiles, winks, and nudges people share communicate the same message.

Leaders can take steps to make bad situations better. They can examine common situations that people face and ask themselves, "Are there changes that can be made that will bring out the best in people rather than encourage their worst behavior?"

I'll discuss ways of modifying social situations in next week's column.