Post-game concert

The Tuber Bowl had just ended, players from both sides were exchanging ha and fans were cheering when Prince To'o the seer stepped to the balcony of the royal box.

"Queen Tuberosa, King Kavawai, Princess Tuberosa La'a, priests, chiefs, all kane and wahine," he said, addressing the crowd, "we have a surprise. On this auspicious occasion, the young Oahu chief Kaneloa, of whom you have heard for his devotion to the gods and for his bravery in spearing the monstrous mo'o, will undergo his final test, the musical portion."

A murmur ran through the crowd, and the princess felt a tingle run up her back as Kaneloa walked out onto the field, where To'o had produced a large sharkskin pahu drum. To'o waved his arm and the crowd fell silent.

As he always did, Kaneloa rubbed his hands together, took a deep breath, called on the bones of Kamehameha to offer just a little mana so that his playing would please the gods.

He began with the sacred "Dem Bones," slapping the drum with passion, precision and rhythm, and soon everyone was dancing, including the princess.

"Me dear," her mother the queen softly scolded, "let's save our exuberance for later."

Kaneloa shifted to the even more uptempo "It's Swingtime In Tuberville," and soon even the queen was doing the royal booty boogie.

Stepping to the side of the drum, maintaining the beat, Kaneloa began to chant and dance hula.

"Oh my goodness," the princess sighed when Long Man's hips began to sway.

"Oh ... ooh ... oh..." the queen echoed.

As the song ended, the crowd began to whoop and holler and cheer, shouting "Hana hou!" -- but again To'o waved an arm and all fell silent. "Kaneloa's test is done, the royal family will now decide."

"If I may," Kaneloa said, producing a nose flute from his shoulder bag, and then bowing to the princess up in the royal box. "As I journeyed through The Tube from Oahu, I composed this song for you, Princess, and if you should choose me, I shall play it for you every night."

He raised the flute to his nose and the first note was ethereal, lifting the spirit of all who heard it, yet also earthy and full of humanity, and the princess felt herself falling ... slipping ... easing into love.

And then he began to chant "Save your eyes only for me, ku'uipo, and let me gaze upon your beauty every morning." Among a people with oversize eyes and the ability to see in the dark, it was a powerful statement of love, and pretty much sealed the deal with the princess. Her heart was Kaneloa's. Stepping to the balcony of the royal box, she tossed tuberose petals to him, the sign that she'd chosen him.

"Impressive," the queen said, regaining her queenliness. "But aren't we getting ahead of ourselves? What about a background check?"