CINDY ELLEN RUSSELL / CRUSSELL@STARBULLETIN.COM Dina Cornwall with her sons Robert, 9, and Christopher, 7. Cornwall coaches indoor soccer teams in Wahiawa.

Mom has a ball
with active role

The Wahiawa coach saves
her tough stance for home
with her boys

As experts in multitasking, mothers wear many different hats, filling the role of cook, nurse, counselor and teacher, at a minimum.

Dina Cornwall fits the bill, going beyond the soccer mom role to coach her 7-year-old son Christopher's team in the Wahiawa SAY Soccer League. Her son Robert, 9, also plays soccer, and coaching and cheering allow her to spend quality time with them on the field.

Where many parents expect a coach to be firm, aggressive and strict, her style runs counter to a "win-at-all-cost, be strong" mentality associated with contemporary athletics down to the most junior levels. Her approach goes back to the old-fashioned notions of fair play, teamwork and respect for the sport.

"I give my speech to the parents letting them know that I'm not going to be forceful with the kids. Why stress them out?" she said. "I want the kids to enjoy the sport and have fun.

Her tactics don't add up to a lot of wins. The games are non-scoring, but it would be safe to say her team loses 70 percent of its games, leading a few of the soccer dads to complain about her laidback approach to the game, but she refuses to conform to American society's "must-win" mentality.

"It doesn't matter if we win or lose, we are learning," she said. "If they learn something new everyday, that is what matters to me.

"I not only have to worry about my own sons, I have to worry about 18 other boys. I try to pay attention to which positions the boys are good at. It's fun when you know that they are out there and really trying."

She never forgets that she's working with other people's kids, and at their young age they are sensitive to scoldings and criticism that can lower self-esteem, which can do long-term harm. She doesn't want to undermine their confidence by spewing negative and unnecessary comments.

Her sons do not seem to mind sharing their mom. In fact, they seem to be happy to have her around, involved in all aspects of their lives.

"My youngest son got a kick out of being able to kick the ball over one of the little kid's heads," she said. "I'm really glad I can share these moments."

CINDY ELLEN RUSSELL / CRUSSELL@STARBULLETIN.COM Soccer coach Dina Cornwall mixes it up with her sons Robert and Christopher.

CORNWALL IS LESS low-key at home. "I'm very hard on the boys at home. My expectations are so different," she said.

Her husband, Linc, agreed. "She is nonaggressive on the field. Here at home is where she puts her foot down."

"It's great having your mom help you with lots of stuff," said Robert. "She used to help at my school so she could see how I was behaving."

Coaching and raising a family doesn't seem to make a dent in Cornwall's energy. If anyone she knows is looking for a volunteer, she's one of the first people they call.

"I volunteer at the school a lot and was a den mother for Boy Scouts, anything that my kids are involved in," she said. "I'm a really hyper person."

She works on an on-call basis at an elementary school, but her main priority is raising her sons. "I've been blessed having a hubby that works. I'm like a princess. I don't bring home an income, so I put so much effort into being a part of their lives."

It's helped that Linc took over as primary caregiver when Dina left for a month-long trip to the mainland. Chauffeuring the kids to their activities, feeding them and getting them to do their homework was taxing, he said. "I definitely have a greater appreciation for all that she does."

Dad joins the family for outings such as bicycle rides. And both boys said they like doing puzzles, playing checkers and just hanging out with Mom, too.

Cornwall's emphasis on family might be a result of having been born to a family with 10 children. She said the women in her Hispanic family were strong and extremely family-oriented.

"When I played sports, I would have loved to see my mom in the stands cheering me on," she said, adding she wouldn't change a thing about her life.

"Plain and simple, I like coaching," she said. "I just like to be a part of the boys' lives. This is just another thing I can do with my boys."