YOUTH AT RISK
Exercises used in the Breakthroughs for Youth at Risk program help participants develop confidence and trust.
Program helps at-risk
youths turn lives aroundBreakthroughs for Youth at
Risk seeks adults for mentors
There's no manual for raising children, so some parents are surprised when their beloved child becomes part demon in adolescence, causing adults to go into drill sergeant mode, often resulting in a greater rift if the child doesn't like the new restrictions.
Unfortunately, by the time a child starts exhibiting bad behavior, it can be too late. Parents have a lot more influence if they model good behaviors when the child is young, said Clinton Terrell, facilitator of Breakthroughs for Youth at Risk, who's seen the results of poor parenting. His organization works with youths who have lost their way, turning to drugs and crime. Some of this could be avoided, he feels, if parents took time to answer a 2-year-old's multitude of "why?" questions toward taking responsibility and exhibiting good behavior.
"Kids need sound reasons for doing things, or when you expect them to wise up later on, they won't," he said. "If adults drop the mask and get real, results can be authentic and genuine."
BREAKTHROUGHS AIMS to help at-risk children turn their lives around. Following an intensive week-long session during which problems are identified and goals are set, each youth is assigned to a mentor for 10 months to help them stay focused on being productive.
Adult volunteers are currently being sought to be trained as mentors to support the youth, one on one. Forty high school students in the Windward area will be selected for the next program.
The youths are referred to the program by teachers, counselors or others. They are often alienated or angry. "They may feel depressed because they are not connected with someone who cares about them," Terrell said.
Many of the kids who have gone through the Breakthroughs for Youth program started out not trusting people, particularly adults, Terrell said. "They have strong hostility issues and feel that they do not have much to look forward to. They have low self-esteem and self-worth and blame others for their problems. They take very little responsibility for what is happening in their lives," he said.
Since 1987 the program has served more than 400 youths. According to Terrell, the program has a 90 percent success rate based on several factors including a reduction in arrests, drug and alcohol use, and improved relationships.
"We have a good reputation for being able to deal with attitudes, thinking patterns, beliefs, emotions, feelings and behaviors," Terrell said. "We teach kids about who they are as human beings."
Listening is crucial for learning and motivation, Terrell said. "We listen to them like it's nobody's business, to their hearts and soul. ... They have the experience of being valued," he said. "The kids learn more about respect and appreciation. The schools don't teach listening skills, which is insane."
BYAR President Sharon Lester echoed his sentiment. "Schools don't work for youth at risk because they focus on raising test scores and improving behavior rather than on changing beliefs and attitudes."
"They really try to find the problems," said Tisha Pelekai, 22, a Breakthroughs graduate who entered the program at age 16. "I was sheltered, had a lot of hate. My junior year, everything got turned upside down."
A week-long intensive program "helped bring out all the anger," Pelekai said. "They yell at you and scream at you. It was kind of like boot camp." She literally "stood in a box" until she was ready to open up.
"I used to only talk to certain people. I never opened up to anyone. If someone just looked at me, I wanted to fight."
Everyone in the group broke down, she said. "Now I have self-confidence and I'm not confused anymore. They made me realize what I want to do with my life."
She managed to graduate from high school on time and enrolled at Honolulu Community College in pursuit of a career in criminal justice.
Most of the youths do go back to their original environment, Terrell said, "but they learn how to deal with things that can be changed. They have power and the knowledge that they can do things they never imagined possible."
The kids are taught why they need to take responsibility for their lives. "Every kid leaves the course with a dream and clearly defined goals," he said.
The next mentor training session for Breakthroughs for Youth at Risk takes place Friday to Sunday. Call 235-2547.
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