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Alo-Ha! Friday Charles Memminger |
Famous Amos’ e-mails
are breathtakingYou'd think that if someone asked Wally "Famous Amos" what he liked best about life, he'd say "cookies!" After all, the renowned cookie maker was the face that launched a thousand (chocolate) chips.
But Wally e-mails that what he really likes about life is breathing.
"If you're breathing," he points out, "you have a good chance of putting everything else together."
In case you didn't know, Wally's cookie fortunes are merely the foundation that allows him to travel around giving inspirational speeches. The guy is so upbeat, sometimes you just want to smack him. (Just kidding, Wally.)
If you are interested in receiving his relentlessly optimistic and sanguine Wally-isms by e-mail, contact him at wamos@hawaii.rr.com.
Now the news:
Gut shot for belly dancers
CAIRO (AP) >> Egypt's foreign belly dancers have been given their marching orders.The government says it wants to protect homegrown practitioners of the seductive Middle Eastern dance. The government is no longer issuing work permits to foreign dancers or renewing existing ones.
(Dern. And I just shaved my tummy and packed my veils.)
Sex stunt proves fatal
NEW YORK (AP) >> A woman who had sex with her boyfriend inside St. Patrick's Cathedral as part of a radio show stunt has been sentenced to five days of community service.Loretta Lynn Harper, 36, and Brian Florence, 38, were arrested last year after a police officer listening to a radio show heard details of the stunt in progress. Florence died of a heart attack several months after the incident occurred.
(So, compared with the wrath of God, five days' community service seems pretty reasonable.)
Cops try colorful idea
HANOI, Vietnam (AP) >> Police have armed themselves with paintball guns to brand and track robbers and illegal motorbike racers.The guns will be used to pelt thieves and racers with red, yellow and green dyes, said police Chief Tran Quoc Hung.
Robbery is not a major problem in Hanoi, but street racing on motorbikes is common.
(Chief Hung said paint guns are a safe way to mark and track criminals, and "besides, it's fun to shoot the idiots.")
'Honolulu Lite' on Sunday:
To Catch a Rat II: The Rat Man Cometh. The next installment in the continuing sprawling saga of love, fear, death and half-eaten dog food nuggets.
Quote me on this:
"Men have a much better time of it than women. For one thing, they marry later. For another thing, they die earlier." -- H.L. Mencken
See the Columnists section for some past articles.
Charles Memminger, winner of National Society
of Newspaper Columnists awards, appears
Tuesdays, Thursdays , Fridays and Sundays.
E-mail cmemminger@starbulletin.com
