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Sidelines Kalani Simpson |
Lamenting the loss
of a team playerPEOPLE don't know how to celebrate the Fourth of July anymore. For example, one television network is using the holiday to show a James Bond movie marathon.
Uh ... I hate to go into a long discourse about the technical aspects of the Revolutionary War, but James Bond is English.
So I don't feel too bad today for writing about something other than the Declaration of Independence. Indulge me. At least this subject is 100 percent American.
You see, we're losing a teammate.
Now, relax. It's fine. Nobody's dying. You can go back to your firecrackers and barbecue chicken. Don't cancel the trip to the beach.
It's just that Tim Crouse, one of our guys here in the sports department, is leaving for the mainland. Off to get married to the love of his life.
It isn't easy losing a teammate. Especially him.
"If anybody's getting into heaven," sports editor Paul Arnett once said, "it's him. He's gonna help me out up there. We're counting on you to let us under the rope."
Yes, he'll be on the list. That's a sure thing. Tim is nice. Doesn't drink. Doesn't smoke. Doesn't curse. He loves the Lord.
The filthiest thing that ever passed his lips may have been this: "I have to say, she's a nice looking lady."
Really. He says stuff like that.
This level of purity can be sickening, but somehow, Tim pulls it off. It's real. He has a good heart.
Of course, this kind of thing can turn into a running joke. And it has. Oh, it has.
The popular refrain goes, "As Tim would say -- &%^$#*@!"
Tim, who would never say any such thing, only pretends not to hear.
You have to have a good sense of humor, if you're Tim Crouse.
On every team there are locker room guys. Tim Crouse is a locker room guy. You want him around. The kind of guy who makes everything better just by showing up.
He can speak passionately about local high school sports. He knows all there is to know about women's athletics.
His favorite athlete in all the world was tennis ace Lindsay Davenport. Before she got married.
Sure, he has faults. He's a vehement Republican. He's a fan of Barry Bonds. But we live with his shortcomings the way he tolerates ours.
But all of that is over now as he takes the Big Swan Dive.
First, that little phone of his began ringing more and more often. Then he oh so casually let slip the word "girlfriend" a few times, as if trying it out.
Girlfriend?
Then, before you knew it, came the bombshell. He was out of here. Man, it was cool when he told us why.
We'll miss him. We need him. Someone has to let us in under the rope.
See the Columnists section for some past articles.
Kalani Simpson can be reached at ksimpson@starbulletin.com