Secrets to Success Deborah Cole Micek

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Four steps to gaining
the cooperation of others

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Successful people who advance to the top of their industry are people who have learned to communicate "in style." They have the ability to adapt and work with different types of people.

Take managers for instance. Successful managers make everyone feel comfortable. They know treating everyone equally does not mean treating everyone the same way. Unsuccessful managers, on the other hand, have a one-size-fits-all approach. They communicate with everyone the same way they want to be communicated with.

If you're in charge of getting results through people (and let's face it, we all are) and you want to be successful at what you do, then you need to apply the "Platinum Rule."

My coach taught me about the Platinum Rule when I obtained my first management position in a nonprofit agency. It was a trying time when I needed to implement a number of changes quickly. Learning this rule was a lifesaver, and to this day it continues generates results every time I employ it.

Essentially, the Platinum Rule takes the Golden Rule to the next level. It simply means: Treat others the way they want to be treated. Others may not have the same communication style as you, nor the same motivating values. So if you start to communicate with them in the same way you would like them to communicate with you -- you'll probably be way off base. You could alienate that person in as little as 120 seconds.

Four steps

Apply these four steps below, and you'll have a good start in applying the Platinum Rule. The more you learn about what makes other people tick, the better off you'll be when you need to gain support from others to accomplish your personal or professional goals.

>> Understand yourself. Understand your own communication style and be aware of how others may perceive you in different situations. Don't let your strength be a turn-off to others.

>> Recognize the other person's communication style -- quickly! Each person has a unique communication style that can take years to fully understand. But with some targeted coaching and a little experience, in less than two minutes you can identify a decent communication style base-line from which to build rapport.

>> Appreciate our differences. We are all here for a specific purpose, and we need one another to succeed. This is especially important in company teams. When everyone is fulfilling responsibilities they are naturally gifted to do they will be energized and getting exponentially better results.

>> Adapt your behavior. Sometimes this means doing things that may not come naturally to you. But since it brings respect to the person you are communicating with, your message will be heard.

Communicating in style is just like learning a different language. It feels strange at first, but the more you develop your skills, the more successful you'll be at understanding ... and being understood. Instead of a wall of resistance going up, you'll be met with an open door.

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John-Paul Micek is a small-business strategist
and chief operating officer at RPM Success Group.
Reach him at JPM@RPMsuccess.com
or toll-free at (888) 334-8151.