Kauai’s all abuzz
over rampant rumors
of celeb weddingsIs it Jennifer and Ben or Harrison and
Calista or Gwyneth or Matt or no one at all?
LIHUE >> Kauai's "Celebrity Wedding of the Year" scheduled (maybe) for tomorrow may, in fact, be multiple weddings ... or no wedding at all.
Kauai residents, generally pretty unfazed by celebs because so many come and go regularly, are abuzz this week with tidbits of matrimonial rumor, many of which are false but a few of which actually are confirmed, more or less.
The rumors have been so intense and contradictory that they appear to have caused a complete meltdown of the "coconut wireless," usually considered much faster and more reliable than CNN on Kauai.
Even the pros are shaking their heads.
"I heard 36 rumors that said one thing, then I heard 36 rumors that totally contradicted the first 36," said a Kauai freelance writer who contributes to a celeb-spotting magazine.
In the absence of any hard facts, here is a rundown of some of the hottest rumors:
>> The primary rumor is that the happy couple is Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez.
BUT, a counter-rumor is that both are working on pictures in separate locations in Canada.
Another counter-rumor is that Affleck and Lopez were secretly married a week ago, so they can't be THE couple.
If that is true, they spent part of their honeymoon at a baseball game. The couple received considerable attention from ESPN on "Sunday Night Baseball," where both were in the crowd at Edison Stadium watching the Anaheim Angels in the nationally televised game.
>> The No. 2 rumor is that the couple getting married is Harrison Ford and Calista Flockhart. There have been numerous Ford sightings over the past two weeks, and Flockhart is a frequent visitor, often renting a house in Haena on the North Shore.
That could mean there will be two weddings ... or none at all.
>> Another "alternative rumor" is that Gwyneth Paltrow is on Kauai to be married on Anini Beach. There have been several reported sightings of Paltrow, but not nearly as many as of Ford.
>> The latest entry involves Matt LeBlanc, of "Friends." He seems the least likely candidate, which probably means LeBlanc is the guy going to the altar, if anyone is.
An eyewitness swore yesterday he saw LeBlanc and longtime girlfriend Melissa McKnight arrive at Lihue Airport in a private jet and speed away in a limo.
The entire cast of "Friends" celebrated New Millennium Eve in 1999 in Hanalei, and many have frequented Kauai since. So, it could be LeBlanc ...
Celebrity spotters know there are certain key indicators that prove a Hollywood social event on Kauai is imminent.
One is that the Princeville Hotel, where celebs often stay when on Kauai, is sold out.
"Well, it's almost sold out," says Princeville spokeswoman Stephanie Reid, "about 90 percent, in fact -- but that's because we have a convention of orthodontists going on."
A question as to whether any celebs are hiding among the dentists went unanswered.
Another key celebrity wedding indicator is the sudden unavailability of helicopters. The first rumor this week was that every chopper on the island had been chartered for Saturday by paparazzi. That was countered by a second rumor that all the helicopters had been rented by the wedding couple so photographers couldn't use them.
A check of many Lihue-based helicopters found that none had chartered their choppers to anyone tomorrow; however, a clerk at Safari Helicopters said she heard from a girlfriend at Princeville-based Helio USA Hawaii that the couple getting married had booked all their helicopters to keep photographers from using them.
So, who is the couple?
"Ben and Jennifer, absolutely."
BUT, a spokeswoman at Helio USA said all their helicopters are being used Saturday to take tourists on the regular tours, as usual.
Then there are the limousines. Celebrities need limousines. Rumors were that every limo on Kauai -- three companies with a total fleet of six vehicles -- is booked solid for Saturday.
"Well, we're booked for a wedding, but we're not booked for THAT wedding," said an employee of Custom Limo.
BUT both Kauai Limo and North Shore Limo are booked, and neither company knows exactly who hired them.
"We'll be told where to go on Saturday," said the owner of one.
"They didn't tell us what it's for," said the owner of the other.