Isle psychologists offer tips
to deal with war anxiety

Children especially need
reassurance and emotional help

---

By Leila Fujimori
lfujimori@starbulletin.com

Worries about war with Iraq are already plaguing some Hawaii residents, local psychologists say.

"Anxiety levels are up since the deadline was given," said Gloria Neumann, a police psychologist and president of the Hawaii Psychological Association.

"A lot of decisions are on hold. Do you make family trips? Do you plan weddings? People are kind of holding their collective breath."

Some people are having difficulty concentrating and having sleep disturbances, although most in Hawaii are not terribly anxious, she said.

It's the not knowing, feelings of being powerless and helpless that makes things difficult, Neumann said.

People are also distressed because of a lack of unanimity over what the government is doing, said Mary Sheridan, Hawaii Pacific University professor of social work.

"Some people accuse those who don't want to go to war as being unpatriotic, though they truly support the country," while others are frustrated about getting their opinions heard in Washington.

Psychologists stressed people should realize what they are experiencing is normal, whether it is being preoccupied, having nightmares or becoming more irritable.

If, however, people talk with one another about how they are feeling, look toward one another to help and reach out to others, that can help, Sheridan said.

In dealing with the stresses of war, people should understand war is temporary, that they will probably be OK and should reflect on how many trying events they have survived.

Everyone has his or her own way of coping, but here are some suggestions:

• Keep occupied. Stay focused, taking one problem at a time, handling the most pressing need first.

• Talk about problems with friends and family. Stay around those positively focused and stay away from whiners, who are not focused on solutions.

• Keep in contact with people you care for.

• Maintain a normal routine, which gives a sense of safety and control and is particularly important for children.

• Do not overdose on news coverage of the war.

• Prepare an emergency kit with basic supplies, food, water, keeping car's gas tank filled.

  Some tips on how to take care of yourself physically:

• Breathe. Deep breathing calms the body and allows time to pause and act rather than react.

• Get enough sleep, or at least rest if you have trouble sleeping.

• Eat healthy.

• Drink lots of water.

• Avoid alcohol and extra caffeine.

• Exercise. Swimming helps move the upper body, where most people carry their tension.

"Life is really about balance," Neumann said. "When you're under stress, you need to go have fun. Even in the worst of times, remind yourself that it's OK to have fun. Otherwise, you get caught up with negative things."

People should watch for clues that something might be amiss with family members or friends such as changes in sleeping or eating patterns.

That would be a cue to provide a listening ear, to try to understand the other person and his fears to help them cope.

"Having somebody understand and listen to our emotions and accept them can really go a long way to deal with them," said psychologist Don Kopf, director of counseling at Chaminade University.

"Sometimes the best thing we can do is give a hug to somebody, especially kids," Kopf said.

Those experiencing serious anxiety may seek professional help from a psychologist, social worker or psychiatrist.

Parents and teachers can watch for signs such as unprovoked outbursts, withdrawal for those who are normally outgoing, not doing their homework for those who normally would.

"Sometimes kids don't know why they're reacting the way they do," said Larry Biggs, principal of Mokapu Elementary School on Marine Corps Base Hawaii in Kaneohe. "They don't have the vocabulary to express themselves."

Parents can help children by doing the following:

• Let them know the conflict is far away and that daily routines will continue.

• Tell them the United States is much larger than Iraq, and its troops are well prepared and trained.

• Exercise care in the amount of news coverage children watch. Be aware of news programs that may show coverage that may be too graphic, especially for younger ones.

Biggs suggests parents and teachers of military-dependent children listen more, be more receptive and not dwell on war-type issues.

The American Psychological Association offers help at www.helping.apa.org -- click on "Building Resilience in Time of War" -- or call 800-964-2000 for a brochure.