Sidelines
Bulldogs,
the Big 12
and BubbaCATTERED shots, scattered mind:
>> And now a word from Fresno State president John Welty: "It is imperative that this institution guarantee its academic integrity. I simply will not tolerate academic misconduct in any form."
... said the man who hired Tark the Shark.
I love Tark the Shark. I am a big Tark fan. But anyone who dares act surprised at this whole mess should be locked in a room with a host of "Joe Millionaire" and "The Bachelor" contestants who claim to be merely "looking for a real relationship."
\>> By keeping Fresno State out of its tournament, the WAC is making a statement that this week in Tulsa stands for nothing but an invitation to the NCAA's big dance. Maybe everyone else already knew this. But somehow I've always thought conference tournaments meant just a little more.
>> Priceless: the televised interview in which June Jones, while discussing the possibility of a preseason game against Texas or Texas A&M, had no idea of the name of the Big 12 conference. Didn't know. Didn't care.
In a strange way, you've got to appreciate that.
>> Everyone loved Lance Takaki's dunk. I loved it. It was impossible to not love it. But 7 feet? Lance is just a foot shorter than Mark Campbell, yet they lowered the rim by three feet.
Come on. I could dunk at 7 feet.
(Maybe they should do this for every senior slam from now on. Discreetly lower the rim by six inches or so, just to make sure.)
>> Speaking of a guy who doesn't need the rim lowered, I have been told I have to see BYUH's Alexus Foyle. Got to see Alexus Foyle. Got to see Alexus Foyle.
I have to see Alexus Foyle.
But an 8:30 p.m. tip-off in the Seasiders' NCAA Division II regional opener Friday night means the game won't just run past deadline, but into bedtime.
>> Forget the opening for a defensive coordinator at Hawaii, let's get down to the important stuff: the search for a new UH football television analyst.
My personal front-runner would be the boss, Paul Arnett. Just to see how Jim Leahey would respond to being called "Bubba."
>> Appalachian State. Not a name that awakens the echoes. Still, at this late point in time, signing up any opponent is an accomplishment. Let's give Herman Frazier an optimistic "B."
And let's hope Purdue is still in the top half of the Big Ten in 2006.
>> And, of course, you knew this one was coming, an e-mail entitled "On Behalf of Zips Everywhere": "I can't promise you won't get any nasty messages from the angry Zip faithful -- including the 58 members of 'Zips in Paradise,' the UA Aloha Section Alumni Association."
Luckily, his tone was more educational than confrontational, closing: "Thanks again for thinking about the Zips. They have gotten more coverage in the Hawaii press this year than in the Akron Beacon Journal."
We aim to please.
Kalani Simpson can be reached at ksimpson@starbulletin.com