Alo-Ha! Friday
Rust Bowl needs to be
refilled with moneyFormer Honolulu Mayor Frank Fasi must be having a huge laugh now that the pile of rust known as the Aloha Stadium, which he was against from the get-go, now needs $40 million in repairs. That's more than the blasted thing cost to build. Millions have been pumped into that metal edifice whose main purpose appears to be providing shade for flea markets. How much money will we have to pour into that gigantic calabash before we realize we should just sell the damn thing to the flea market people and build a real stadium in Kapolei?
Now the news:
How to hide an elephant
BERLIN (Reuters) >> "It's easier to hide an elephant than you think," a German police spokesman said after a circus director fled with an ailing pachyderm.The director went on the lam with Kenia after the elephant became depressed over the death of the circus's only other elephant. Police say man and beast have disappeared without a trace.
(One clue, however, is the $500-per-day room service bill being racked up by two guests at the Motel Six off the autobahn.)
Lady has a bone to pick
HOUSTON (Reuters) >> An Alaska woman who received part of her dead father's leg in the mail instead of a gourmet "LobsterGram" she was hoping for is suing the company that sent her the human appendage.The company, Identigene, had tested the leg's DNA as part of an effort to identify the dead man's heirs. The leg was then supposed to be cremated but was sent to the daughter by accident. The woman, who believed she had been sent a LobsterGram, popular in the frozen north, was shocked to discover the bone and flesh.
(Unlike many others who file lawsuits, this plaintiff DOES have a legal leg to stand on.)
A slow year for bribes
NAIROBI, Kenya (Reuters) >> Kenyans paid fewer bribes to government officials last year, although the police remained the most corrupt institution. A graft watchdog agency issued that report a day after a judge was arrested for taking bribes.(In an effort to keep Kenya's huge graft industry afloat, the judge later acquitted himself.)
'Honolulu Lite' on Sunday:
What is a family of three doing with 47 cookbooks? Do I really need a recipe for Stuffed Boar's Head? What do you do with the rest of the boar? Make hash? These and other fascinating culinary questions will be answered in Sunday's "Honolulu Lite."
Quote me on this:
"I can think of 40 better places to spend the summer, all of them on Long Island in a hammock." -- Harpo Marx, when invited on a trip to the French Riviera
Charles Memminger, winner of National Society of Newspaper Columnists awards, appears Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays and Sundays. E-mail cmemminger@starbulletin.com