Honolulu Lite
When I was asked if I'd man a booth at this weekend's State Farm Fair, I said sure. Hey, I've spent a day in a cage at the zoo -- a cage previously occupied by a very messy bear -- so I have no problem hanging out in a pen with cows if it helps sell a few more newspapers. Columnist cattle call
for farm fairNo, the newspaper person organizing the event said, the Star-Bulletin/MidWeek booth will not be in with the animals, it will be outside with the people. I said OK, even though it didn't sound like it would be as much fun as hanging out with prize livestock.
So if you go to the Farm Fair this weekend, be sure to stop by the Star-Bulletin/MidWeek booth. There'll be all manner of relatively domesticated columnists to talk to. Just remember, petting's fine but don't feed them. They'll bite.
Now the news:
When clowns go bad
LONDON >> Manchester police are searching for an armed clown gang that robbed a wine bar. Police said three men dressed as clowns and armed with sawed-off shotguns and knives handcuffed the bar manager and made off with the loot."This was a highly organized team who had obviously spent some time planning this robbery," a detective said.
(Police still are trying to figure out how all three clowns managed to fit in the extremely tiny getaway car.)
Iranian justice in the bag
TEHRAN >> An Iranian man convicted of raping and killing his 16-year-old nephew will be executed by being thrown off a cliff in a sack. If he survives the fall down the rocky precipice, he will be hanged.(If he survives the hanging, he'll get a stern talking-to.)
Judo kids cross thin line
TOKYO >> Six Japanese high school students were ejected from a judo tournament to teach them a lesson after they shaved their eyebrows to a fashionable but intimidating thin line."We have banned thin eyebrows because they are intimidating to opponents and cause displeasure," a tournament organizer stated.
(Officials weren't crazy about the eye shadow, rouge and lipstick, either.)
'Honolulu Lite' on Sunday:
Young people today have to be the most thirst-quenched in the history of teenagers. You rarely see a kid anymore without a bottle of water or a Big Gulp in his hand. Sunday's "Honolulu Lite" will explore the phenomenon of "The Young and the Hydrated."
Quote Me on This:
"When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking." -- Elayne Boosler
Charles Memminger, winner of National Society of Newspaper Columnists awards, appears Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays and Sundays. E-mail cmemminger@starbulletin.com