Lecturer says sisterhood
is key for women’s growth

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By Tim Ryan
tryan@starbulletin.com

Bertice Berry, an award-winning lecturer, stand-up comedian and doctor of sociology, is reluctant to say it, but she says that some of the toughest barriers for women to succeed are themselves and other women.

"Men don't have to like each other's hair to be able to work together like women do," Berry says from her home in San Diego. Women are "burdened at so many levels more than men" to prove themselves.

"The female ego is so much larger than a man's," she says. "We have an ego for cooking, for cleaning, for work, our appearance and our children. Women always feel they're in competition with other women."

Berry brings her message of survival and personal growth to Honolulu at 8:30 a.m. Friday as keynote speaker for the Junior League of Honolulu's Second Annual Women's Conference. The title of Berry's talk is "Reveling & Reckoning I: Finding Your Purpose."

The event was created by women for women with the ultimate goal of strengthening Hawaii's sisterhood and encouraging interaction among women of all ages and professions.

Other headlining speakers are the women of Na Leo Pilimehana, who will speak about "Life Balancing," improving the quality of life as mothers, wives, daughters and professional musicians; and Jennifer and Laura Berman, co-directors of the Female Sexual Medicine Center at UCLA, who talk about issues of sex, lies and health.

"Individually we all have a purpose, a reason to wake up and get up to do what we need to do," Berry said. "But the collective, working together, is always better.

"But there is a lack of support that women give one another, and that hurts us all, shakes our purpose. When we are out of purpose, the whole family falls apart, the job falls apart and women especially fall apart."

Part of the answer is women "rallying around one another to celebrate who we are," she said.

Berry says society has impressed on women the need to remain attractive.

"Women concern themselves with their hair because they think men are concerned, but it's not a real concern for men at all," she says, laughing.

That sort of mind-set, or "dependency," causes lack of confidence and power, Berry said.

Growing up poor in Wilmington, Del., as the sixth of seven children, Berry wanted to be a teacher, social worker or nurse. In high school she took accelerated classes, determined to go to college.

A wealthy benefactor had contacted the Jacksonville University in Florida, looking for a promising student to support, and she was selected.

During her undergraduate studies, Berry worked part time as a social worker. In 1982 she graduated magna cum laude and was awarded the President's Cup for leadership.

After graduation, Berry worked as a researcher for the Victims Assistance Agency in Florida and designed an intake format for an all-county rape crisis center before earning a master's degree from Kent State University. From there she entered Kent State's doctoral program in sociology and began teaching part time. She became one of the most popular instructors on campus by using humor as a tool for learning.

She eventually left Kent State to become an award-winning entertainer and lecturer.

The daughter of an unmarried alcoholic mother, Berry watched the cycle of addiction permeate the next generation when her sister's three children were born addicted to crack cocaine. Berry is raising those three children and two others.

"The bottom line is loving ourselves as much as we love everybody else, taking care of ourselves as much as we take care of everyone else," she said.

HerStory Junior League of Honolulu's Second Annual Women's Conference Where: Koolau Golf Club When: 7:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. Friday Cost: $85 Call: 946-6466

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