My Kind of Town

by Don Chapman

Nuked, completely

>> Portlock

Muhammed Resurreccion was gracious, polite, well-spoken -- the perfect guest. But out on the lanai, watching him speaking with her maid Rosalita -- his cousin-in-law -- and playing with Rosalita's little daughter Elizabeth, Lily Ah Sun suddenly knew what bothered her about the visitor from Zamboanga. Lily didn't trust him, and it had to do with more than just his Muslim first name. She didn't trust him because watching Muhammed was like watching an accomplished method actor. Which moved the little arrow on her internal B.S. Meter into the red zone. Lily had a very low tolerance for B.S. and a keen sense for its presence. Maybe it was her business training, maybe her experiences with men. She was, if nothing else, a fast learner.

Lily certainly learned about her cousin Quinn's womanizing ways in a hurry. Her B.S. Meter had missed on him at first, but love and hormones will throw it off every time.

Or maybe, Lily thought, her anger and hurt were now throwing her meter out of kilter. Maybe what she didn't like about Muhammed was that, like Quinn, he was man, a breed that simply cannot be trusted.

The phone rang and Rosalita stood to answer it, but Lily waved her off.

"Hey, Lil, me!" Her friend Shauny Nakamura.

"Hey, Shauny," Lily said, taking the phone inside.

"Great news!" Shauny almost always spoke in exclamation points.

"I could use some."

"After you told me about falling for your cousin Quinn, I went online and did a little research! And you're in luck! Hawaii Revised Statute 572-1 makes it perfectly lawful for first cousins to marry! Cool, huh?!"

"Sorry to have wasted your time," Lily said, slumping into the big white leather couch in the living area.

"What?!"

"Pau already."

"That's a world record!"

"Yeah, I was about to call Guinness."

What happened?!"

"I stopped by his room at Queen's and caught him with another woman, kissing, and she was touching him."

"What a creep!"

"Totally. If we go another 21 years without talking, it's fine with me."

"Well, if you ever make up, you can marry him!" Shauny, ever the optimist.

"Not a chance."

Shauny knew what that meant. "You already burned that bridge?"

"Nuked it, completely."

And now there was another relationship that needed nuking too, Lily thought. With the other man in her life.

---

Don Chapman is editor of MidWeek.
His serialized novel runs daily in the Star-Bulletin
with weekly summaries on Sunday.
He can be emailed at dchapman@midweek.com