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Duty. To a child the little word carries the weight of one, no, two boulders sitting on scrawny little shoulders; the obligation to family, friends, society and country about as easy to shrug off as a birthmark.
Designer Amos Kotomori
plans a fashion show that pays
tribute to the dignity of all womenBy Nadine Kam
nkam@starbulletin.comSome sag under the burden and bend to society's many demands. Others rebel, fighting for every ounce of independence and individuality. And then are those who neither follow nor accept nor fight, but actually begin to see the limitless potential when human beings are kind to one another.
Amos Kotomori knows the feeling. The fashion designer, stylist, filmmaker and artist once toiled for little more than the thrill and joy of creating objects of beauty. Today, preparing for the 50th annual Cherry Blossom Fashion Show, he still radiates exuberance, though these days, it's tempered by that sense of duty, which he has discovered means much more than mere sacrifice.
"There's got to be a reason for doing things," he said. "The last time I did a show was three years ago for Wilcox Hospital, and the goal there was to raise funds to build a meditation garden. I thought there needed to be awareness about it."
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With the fashion show, "Hanamatsuri," literally meaning "flower festival," the ultimate goal is to raise funds for the Hawaii Children's Cancer Foundation, but in Kotomori's eyes, its dual purpose is "to honor the women who nurture and influence who we become."It's no coincidence that another translation of "hanamatsuri" is "moment of enlightenment."
"I think Sept. 11 brought us to this point, but I think we all get to this point in life when you want to share what you have, do something or create an event that helps more than yourself," he said. "It's a way of giving back."
The show will feature styles that go beyond the festival's celebration of Japanese culture to embrace world culture. There are elements of Africa, Europe, India, Asia and Hawaii, the latter in the form of a wedding dress inspired by the kikepa, or sarong, incorporating fabric Kotomori has collected around the world.
"It's eclectic how it's combined but I think it's very wearable," he said. Considering the pieces are one-of-a-kind, prices are fair, comparable to those of upscale mass retailers at mostly $75 to $350, with formal gowns running up to $1,500.
Beyond being mere material goods, the garments are intended to honor the dignity of women.
"In my mind this show asks all of us to stop and think about the women in our lives who brought us here," said Kotomori, who grew up with a lenient and progressive-minded father, and a local-born mother who was raised in Japan and brought back its traditions.
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"When I think of the women who changed my life, the first obviously is my mom, who taught me the basics of working hard, doing right," he said. "I'm a visual person, so I learned more from what she did than said as she worked with people, dealt with people. I learned the importance of the extended family, helping others. We had an open door. Many people lived with us or stayed with us."She also taught me the superstitions associated with Japanese numerology, understanding the importance of your name, and the reasons for rituals. And as hard as you try not to be like your parents, like it or not, you become like them."
His mother, Tamayo Kotomori, is helping to this day, and her hand, as well as that of her friend Florence Teruya, is in every garment, as she has been sewing for Kotomori since his longtime seamstress, Betsy Ihara, died.
Kotomori has lost several women friends to cancer and says, "There is not a day where I don't think of them." He recalls one friend, Ne'e Todd, who was always among the first to call and wish him a happy birthday, and was mindful of those little gestures that have the power to lift spirits.
She had pancreatic cancer but was feisty to the end, insisting that she would not die of her cancer, but in a car accident.
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"When she died, her twin brought me the baby grand piano Ne'e wanted me to have. I use the piano now more as a buffet, party thing. People sit and play and have a good time. It just shows you that people never really leave you. Their presence is always felt."I think women have an inner core that is not a matter of being stronger than a man or showing a feminine side. I think there's an acceptance of humanity that you see in women, and grace in simply finding everyday joys, doing one's best at every moment and just being kind.
"The Dalai Lama said it's time for a revolution based on a religion of kindness."
KOTOMORI'S MOTHER also happens to be the inspiration for Kotomori's film project, "My Mother's Words."
It started when Tamayo Kotomori started to write down the little sayings she learned from her mother and father.
"It's the perfect gift anyone could leave as a legacy, an understanding of who you are and where you came from," Amos said.
"It was interesting, watching my mother raise my niece, seeing that all the phobias that were put into me were going into her as well, and I thought, 'So that's where I got this thing.'"
One of those "things" was that one could not make a living from the arts.
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"That's why I have a degree in education," Kotomori said. "There are members of my family who still don't understand what I do and are waiting for me to get a job. They don't understand that for a creative person this is a job. They think that if you're in a creative field, you're so happy that you don't deserve to be paid for it."At the same time, Kotomori grew up with a willingness to take chances, having been given the middle name of Sadamu, meaning "never fail." It was the name his mother used most when addressing him.
"There is a greater risk factor in that as a child I would just go for it. It's not that I never failed, but I'd always learn from my mistakes. It just reinforced my ability to face challenges.
"There are a lot of things that didn't make sense then that are beginning to make sense now. When you're growing up, there are certain things you don't want to do, that you do because you're afraid not to.
"When my father passed away, my mother chose to honor his memory with orthodox Buddhist ceremonies. I think it was really difficult for her to do, but what she wanted was to show her devotion to him. There's a real place for tradition in that I think it helped her make the passage between mourning and grieving.
"It made me understand that these rituals exist, if for no other reason than to make you feel better so you can continue."
As for other little superstitions, Kotomori was dutiful in building the Cherry Blossom show around 101 garments, because in Japanese numerology denominations of 10 are auspicious. That's why there are 1,001 cranes folded into good-luck trees or wall hangings.
The one tacked to the ending "is like perfection," Kotomori said, "pushing it beyond 1,000 blessings. It's just something to work toward. It's just nicer."
Fashion show celebrating the 50th Cherry Blossom Festival, and benefiting the Hawaii Children's Cancer Foundation 'Hanamatsuri'
When: 11 a.m. Saturday, with boutique sales from 10 a.m.
Where: Hilton Hawaiian Village Coral Ballroom
Entertainers: Robert Cazimero, Kenny Endo, Nueva Vida, Anita Hall, Al Bacarse, Darrin Miyashiro, Tangentz and the Ka Ula Kili Huna halau
Tickets: $35 and $45
Call: 949-2255
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