Justice kept under cover

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When Attorney General John Ashcroft isn't busy trying to personally strap John "Taliban" Walker into Old Sparky and flip the switch, he holds press conferences in the halls of the Department of Justice. But if his sound bites are looking a little different, that's because thousands of dollars of taxpayer money have been spent to shield the American public from marble breasts.

Like many grand old government buildings, Justice is decorated with imposing statues. Some of these pieces have exposed, socio-realist breasts, which was apparently OK during our grandparents' time, but not today. They freak out John Ashcroft.

So they're being "draped" so Ashcroft won't be intimidated by them. He did, after all, lose an election to a dead man.

But such a move by a powerful individual to hammer on public morality smells more Taliban than American. Perhaps Ashcroft has had the statues measured for marble burqas as well.

--Burl Burlingame

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