Kalani Simpson


By Kalani Simpson

Tuesday, November 20, 2001

Seeing Tiger, sandwiches
a Poipu treat

POIPU, Kauai >> Still no sign of Tiger. Maybe because I'm not looking for Tiger, not yet. I'm looking for the media lunch room. First things first.

Found the media lunch room. Embarked on Scooby Doo sandwich.


(Those cookies are ono.)

It is my aim to cover the PGA Grand Slam of Golf like the great Dan Jenkins, whose strategy at the big events was to sit around all day sipping cool drinks and eating sandwiches. I am a big fan of this strategy. I don't see how it could go wrong. Of course Dan Jenkins is a genius who everyone tells their secrets to. He always got the best story. And I am some guy stuffing his face.

Still no sign of Tiger. He must not know about the sandwiches. Luckily, they've included a Tiger Woods biography. Thirty-two pages (32!). Age 24 alone is over two pages. At age 24, I had a word and a half.

Looked over Tiger's biography (a three-sandwich read).

Decided that "Espys" don't count.

Went back to the sandwich. Plenty of time to see Tiger today.

>> Nevermind kickers and return men, the Mosi Tatupu special teams award should be for guys like Sean Butts, guys who run 40 yards on a dead sprint and land on their heads. Butts is playing his position (special teams) as well as any player on the Hawaii team. He should be first-team All-WAC.

>> Somebody ask Dick Tomey who his best special teams player was.

>> Has anybody seen Rolo? Is his arm in a sling? After 53 passes, he'd better ice that thing down.

>> "Best receiving corps in the nation?" Well, no. But Saturday night they were.

>> I love sailing through to the stadium in two and a half minutes, but people, please, go to the game!

People, please, look at those offensive numbers!

I don't want to end up covering slow-pitch softball.

>> There is at least one UH fan walking around singing the "Ultra-7" theme song.

>> If Travis Laboy plays, Hawaii beats Air Force.

>> Kansas, Duke and UCLA at the Maui Invitational?

Tiger who?

>> Here's something to think about: If Lily Kahumoku had played this year, does Kim Willoughby approach the all-time greats?

The word here is no.

All we heard at the start of this year was what the Wahine didn't have, but for once the WAC schedule helped instead of hurt, and UH just kept getting better and better.

This is a great Wahine team next year. Next year. But this year isn't over yet.

>> A friend from Des Moines, Iowa, wanted to know how Hawaii was going to do against Drake. With Savo-dem sitting out, a Rainbows win over the Bulldogs is a good sign.

You don't think the NCAA is dragging this decision out, do you?

>> Right now, right this second, off seeing Friday night's performances, Kahuku has the state's most dangerous, most talented players.

But St. Louis looks like the most impressive team.

Kalani Simpson's column runs Sundays, Tuesdays and Fridays.
He can be reached at

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