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Honolulu Lite

CHARLES MEMMINGER

Sunday, June 24, 2001


A ‘Stupid Crimes’ law
would punish the
really dumb

HAVING FREQUENTLY been on the receiving end of "hate crimes," I guess I should applaud our new hate crimes law.

I think it is safe to assume that every time someone calls you a "f---ing haole" while robbing you, as often happened in high school here, it's a racially motivated crime and should be treated more harshly than a regular old robbery. I was tied up to a desk in high school because I was white and the teacher walked out of the room.

Under the "hate crimes" law, the incident would not only be considered kidnapping, but racially driven kidnapping. Those guys who did it might get extra jail time for that offense. Plus, today I'd be able to sue the school for allowing the incident to happen. And I might even be able to sue that teacher as an accessory in the crime since he not only didn't stop it, but fled the scene, allowing the boys to practice some of their better knots in the tying-up exercise.

The last day of school, "Kill Haole Day," would have produced a mother lode of indictments for all the hate crimes that took place on that day. No haole was ever killed but plenty were roughed up, robbed and terrorized.

So I should applaud the hate crimes law, but I can't. Because the same judges who let killers and rapists walk the street are still going to be the ones imposing the sentences for hate crimes. If a judge wasn't inclined to give someone who took part in a baseball bat beating death more than one year in prison, simply labeling the crime hate-motivated isn't going to suddenly turn the liberal jurist into Judge Roy Bean.

People who commit violent crimes based on hate don't deserve to walk among us. People who commit violent crimes period, don't deserve to walk among us. My big worry, as previously stated, is that forcing the prosecutor to prove, beyond a reasonable doubt, that hate was the motivation for a crime, is going to let some very bad people off the hook. It's one thing to prove that someone was tied to a desk by certain people; it's another thing to prove that they did it because of race, even if they called the victim a "f---ing haole."

Robert Becker wrote a letter to the editor recently suggesting that crimes of stupidity should be considered more serious than regular crimes. Becker's observation is brilliant. The public needs as much protection from crime inspired by, or at least resulting from, stupidity as it does crimes inspired by hate. There are a lot of stupid criminals out there.

A "Stupid Crimes" law should be next on our legislative agenda. Becker points to street racing and going out in a boat without safety equipment as stupid. I disagree. Going out on a boat without safety equipment and having to be rescued is stupid. Putting hundreds of innocent people in mortal danger by street racing is idiotic. So maybe we need "Idiotic Crimes" law, so that idiots would get more jail time then the purely stupid.

There are so many new categories of crime to consider. What about a crime motivated not by hate, but temporary prejudice? What about guys who stalk and kill old girlfriends? They say they do it out of love. In this brave new legal world, a "Love Crimes" law would seem to be the answer.




Alo-Ha! Friday compiles odd bits of news from Hawaii
and the world to get your weekend off to an entertaining start.
Charles Memminger also writes Honolulu Lite Mondays,
Wednesdays and Sundays. Send ideas to him at the
Honolulu Star-Bulletin, 500 Ala Moana Blvd., Suite 7-210,
Honolulu 96813, phone 235-6490 or e-mail cmemminger@starbulletin.com.



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