Hawaii
MY best friend died last week, and as is so often the case, a life had to be condensed into a 12-line obituary. Simon Cardew simply cannot be dispatched so quickly. He died in a hospice in London a week ago today -- on my only son's birthday. Though born in England, Simon lived for many years in Hawaii, and even became an American citizen here. After his diagnosis for Progressive Supranuclear Palsy, and before he lost his voice, he told his adoring British wife, Joan, that he wanted his ashes scattered in waters off Diamond Head. Simon knew he was going to die, and his body was slowly devastated over a 12-year period by PSP, an extremely rare, debilitating disease. It's the identical condition that's now set pianist/actor Dudley Moore on the same, awful, gradual loss of bodily and sensory functions that makes an early death a certitude. Simon seemed an unlikely candidate for such a disease... Simon Cardew:
Bidding aloha
to best friendTHE tennis playing and yacht racing fiend Cardew and I became friends immediately on meeting. In 1965, he auditioned for a production of the British revue, "Beyond the Fringe," which I was directing for the Oumansky Magic Ring Theater. Though he'd had no theater experience, Simon was naturally funny on stage and "terribly British." Ironically, Dudley Moore was in the original company of the same revue in '62...
OF all the jobs Cardew held in Hawaii, he was best known as a public relations man, first for Makai Co., the firm that owned Sea Life Park, Lahaina Pacific & Kaanapali Railway, Royal Hawaiian Air Service and the Hotel Hana Ranch. Later he was hired to do PR for Sheraton Hawaii, then Sheraton Pacific and eventually, Sheraton Europe, Africa and the Middle East. That required leaving his beloved Hawaii home and many friends behind...
I was fortunate enough to be able to visit Simon on numerous trips to Europe, first in Brussels when Sheraton was headquartered there and later London, when the HQ was moved. Simon loved his homeland, but though he never lost the accent, he felt like an American and after he met and married his one and only wife, retired to a $1 million home in San Diego. It was there that he was diagnosed with PSP. The news was devastating when the doctor detected the rare disease and told him, "I can only promise you one thing, Simon. You'll never get better." And after the medical bills mounted enormously, the Cardews had to return to London and the apartment they kept there so that Simon could receive free treatment through the national health program...
I MENTIONED that Simon and I were best friends and we confided everything with one another. He dated numerous women, but never married until he met Joan and found what was missing in all his other relationships, love. Joan stood by him unconditionally and helped him find faith. On my last trip to visit him in February she told me, "Simon is ready to go. Because he knows he's going to a better place."...Oh yes, that brief obituary listed his full name as Simon Basil Duke Cardew. I knew about the "Basil," his father's name, but never once in 36 years heard him mention the name "Duke." Good old Simon. Full of surprises right up until the end. Aloha, old friend.
Dave Donnelly has been writing on happenings
in Hawaii for the Star-Bulletin since 1968.
His columns run Monday through Friday.Contact Dave by e-mail: ddonnelly@starbulletin.com