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The Way I See It
THOUGH it's hard to give a rip right now, the gaudy, overblown, oversexed XFL will debut on Pro Bowl eve. XFL bordering
on X-ratedI'm not sure we'll ever give a rip now that I see the way they're promoting it.
This kind of promotion can mean only one thing: they don't have what they're selling.
Well, sex might make you forget that. Take a gander at www.xfl.com, where luscious Carol, the XFL "reporter," will take you inside the locker room and "do anything I can" to make your experience pleasant.
There are five players with Hawaii connections under contract. They are former University of Hawaii center Dustin Owen (New York Hit Men); former St. Louis School and Brigham Young wide receiver Kaipo McGuire (Birmingham Bolts); Waianae product and NFL veteran linebacker Kurt Gouveia (Las Vegas Outlaws); Farrington High product and former Dallas Cowboy guard Patrick Kesi (Las Vegas Outlaws), and Honolulu-born-but-mainland-raised former NFL linebacker Joe Tuipala (Las Vegas Outlaws).
The XFL promises violence on the field beyond your wildest dreams. I'm not sure what will happen, but it sure won't be skill beyond your wildest dreams.
Pro boxer Jesus Salud was telling me the other day how dangerous it is for youngsters to try WWF moves on each other.
I wonder what the Pop Warner set will learn from watching the XFL.
I WAS listening to a report the other day about opposition to President Bush's plan to fund religious social service programs. The question was, why should any taxpayer be required to support church endeavors?
Not everyone believes in God. Well, not everyone believes in the NFL, either. But taxpayers here will have to cough up about $20 million over the next four years to keep the Pro Bowl in town.
Now, when you think of it, where else would the NFL find a venue like Hawaii for its all-star classic? Really now.
And how many bruised and exhausted all-stars looking for a true escape at season's end would want to play in a mainland city?
By playing in Honolulu, they're 20 to 40 minutes by plane away from neighbor islands, where they can vacation with their families in more privacy and comfort than they'd have on the mainland.
Local politicians have worried for years about Florida stealing away the show, but do you truly believe Florida can compare with Hawaii's exotic appeal?
Do you believe that if the state had said, "Sorry, that $20 million is earmarked for teacher pay raises," the NFL would have said goodbye to 80-degree warmth, pristine blue waters and breathtaking scenery?
TV loves this venue and I doubt the NFL would ever want to abandon it. It's a flight of fantasy for viewers huddled in quilts around their TVs in New England and the Midwest.
OK, I know the horse is already far from the barn on this issue. But I still have to ask why local pols are falling over each other to thank Paul Tagliabue for bestowing his blessings upon paradise.
After all, there's only one Hawaii. I'm betting the NFL needs us more than we need the NFL.
Arrogant of me, huh?
By the way, Tagliabue tells us that the crime rate among NFL players (rape, drug distribution, weapons possession, bribery, domestic assault, DUI, fraud, manslaughter, negligent homicide, murder, etc.) is a model for society in general.
Uh huh. Utopia has come to our shores.
Pat Bigold has covered sports for daily newspapers
in Hawaii and Massachusetts since 1978.
Email Pat: pbigold@starbulletin.com
