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Changing Hawaii
AFTER taking a week off for my father's funeral, and in honor of the young people returning to school or going to college very soon, may I share my version of Maria Shriver's best-seller, "Ten Things I Wish I'd Known -- Before I Went Out Into The Real World" (Warner Books, $19.95)? Ten things Maria Shriver
might want to know...With all due respect to Mrs. Schwarzenegger, here's my own list of the 10 ideals to remember while meandering on the trail of life:
1) Diversify. Don't invest all your money in high-tech stocks, or sink your life savings into a longline fishing vessel, or use only a United Airlines charge card to rack up frequent-flyer miles. If you do, prepare to lose big time when these things suddenly and unexpectedly lose their value.
2) Simplify. Don't buy a cellular phone for personal use because it's expensive, eats up private time and is superfluous. Worst of all, it forces you to ignore those right in front of you and, instead, to communicate with those who aren't even there! (In case of an emergency, like a stalled car, don't worry. Plenty of folks will let you use their business cell phones.)
3) Nurture. Take care of your body or regret it later. Too much suntanning leads to premature wrinkles or skin cancer. Guzzling alcohol damages your liver. Eating too many fatty foods means goodbye gall bladder, hello heart disease.
4) Laugh. Don't take inconsequential things seriously, especially when driving. Those motorists going too slow in the left-hand lane of H-1, or who just iced you out of merging on Kapiolani Boulevard before a lane closure, aren't purposely trying to rile you. They're merely clueless, so suffer their failings with graceful tolerance.
5) Dare. As long as it's not harmful, stupid or illegal, step out of your comfort zone. The most memorable moments occur when you do something out of the ordinary and may never do again. Never have the need to ask yourself the haunting and unanswerable question, "What if?" as in, "What if I had done that? How would it have changed me?"
6) Befriend. Contrary to the headlines, most human beings aren't dastardly but are pleasant, decent and worthy of knowing. Therefore, try to be as friendly as possible -- which means being nice to tourists as well as locals. The mistreatment of visitors only brings bad karma to you, your loved ones, the community and the state as a whole. (See my July 7 column, "A beating in Hawaii kills a man 10 years later.")
7) Evaluate. Date a lot before settling down. Don't marry the first person you fall in love with. And, for goodness sake, if your other half mistreats you, don't accept that fate. Abuse victims can call the Domestic Violence Clearinghouse or other local agencies for professional help in extracting them from their plight.
8) Venerate. Spend quality time with elders. Enjoy their company, absorb their wisdom and make lasting memories to warm you when they're gone. In my case, while I'll miss my 68-year-old dad, remembrances of family fishing trips to Kahana Bay, watching movies while munching on musubi at Waialae Drive-In, and having picnics at Ala Moana Beach Park will sustain me forever.
9) Teach. When you're ready, make your own "Ten Things I Wish I'd Known" list and hand it down to the next generation. You're never too old to teach. They're never too young to learn.
10) Meditate. Be quiet, contemplate and know when to shut up. Enough said.
Diane Yukihiro Chang's column runs Monday and Friday.
She can be reached by phone at 525-8607, via e-mail at
dchang@starbulletin.com, or by fax at 523-7863.