Honolulu Lite
HOW appropriate that Woodstock '99 ended in a blaze of arson, looting, criminal property damage and general mayhem. Woodstock ’99 became
blazing successWoodstock represents the times and this generation of spoiled brats couldn't even compose themselves for three days before collapsing into self-indulgent destruction.
One reason for the outburst, according to what I saw on television, is that hamburgers cost too much. One of the rioters interviewed while the flames still licked at the trailers and tents of the concessionaires explained that if the food sellers hadn't charged five bucks for a hamburger, maybe the riot wouldn't have happened.
It's also appropriate that the conflagration took place just days after the death of John F. Kennedy Jr., when the rest of the world was reflecting on his father's legacy of hope and responsibility.
"Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country," John F. Kennedy said. The wilding at Woodstock shows the mantra today is, "Ask not what your country can do for you, but what has it done for you lately?"
And what did the promoters of Woodstock '99 do for you, poor babies? Did they let you in free? Did they give you T-shirts? Give you free burgers? No, the greedy bastards had the audacity to CHARGE you for those things.
But when you think about it, maybe these kids are the first truly honest generation.
THE warm, fuzzy patina of the Kennedy legacy is slowly losing its glow as historians learn more about the man himself. Take the "Ask not" citation for instance. Kennedy didn't write that. His speech writers cribbed it from a 1916 speech by Warren Harding, who apparently cribbed it from an 1884 speech by Oliver Wendell Holmes. (If Oliver had only known the legs that were on that baby!)
And as for personal responsibility, well, we now know JFK had a satyr complex to beat the band and he was running women who were not his wife through the White House like a herd of majorettes.
William Jefferson Clinton is a mere piker compared to JFK when it comes to the babes, both in sheer numbers and quality. From all we know now, Kennedy never fell for a pasty-faced pudge-muffin like Monica Lewinsky. He went for Marilyn Monroe and mobster molls.
So the difference between the '60s and the '90s is that politicians could erect a cardboard Camelot and the media would play along. But you can only expect the "Do as I say, not as I do" philosophy to last so long before the kids wise up and look behind the facade.
I'm not making excuses for the Woodstock rampage. There's never an excuse for bad behavior, even if it's three days of boozing and rolling around in the mud while being exposed to unrelenting heavy bass riffs and overpriced hamburgers.
But the trickle-down morality that celebrates the "Cult of Me" finally has reached rock ('n roll) bottom. The Cat Stevens is out of the bag. It's time to raze the Dead. Come on baby, light my fire, preferably in the next trailer over. The Woodstock generation can't pretend. They won't play the spin game. Sure, they've got everything on a platter and what they want is a bigger platter.
They are our creation, folks. When John Kennedy said, "For those to whom much is given, much is required," he was talking about responsibility. But as far as today's kids are concerned, he was talking about ketchup and hamburger relish.
Charles Memminger, winner of
National Society of Newspaper Columnists
awards in 1994 and 1992, writes "Honolulu Lite"
Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
Write to him at the Honolulu Star-Bulletin,
P.O. Box 3080, Honolulu, 96802
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71224.113@compuserve.com.
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