Honolulu Lite
HERE'S a test for feminists: This week marks the 36th anniversary of a milestone in the history of women. What is it? Call me Ms. on this
feminist anniversaryThink. This is a biggie. Bigger than Murphy Brown giving birth. Bigger than Hillary Clinton running for U.S. Senate. Bigger even than Barbara Walters snagging an exclusive interview with Monica Lewinsky.
Give up? June 16, 1963, was the day a woman went into space for the first time. Her name was Valentina Vladimirovna, a Russian cosmonaut, and they had to use a larger booster than usual to get all the letters of her name into orbit. Just kidding about the last part.
As father of a future woman, I find myself becoming more of a feminist the older my daughter gets. I am becoming increasingly outraged, in admittedly incremental steps, at gender inequity. I think it's important that my daughter, now 11, appreciate the important strides made by women in history. And that's why I felt it essential for my daughter to know the name of the first woman in space.
When I told my daughter about Vladimirovna, she was underwhelmed. "I think you should learn her name," I said.
"But it's the weekend," she countered. "I'm not supposed to learn anything."
"Look," I said, "How hard can it be to memorize Valentia-whatever-her-name-is?"
"It's my day off," she insisted. "I don't memorize stuff on my day off."
It's tough being a feminist father. I have a feeling women don't really give a rip about who the first woman in space was. But if I pointed out that the first women to be executed, Martha Place, was electrocuted in Sing Sing in 1899, a full year before the first man was electrocuted, well, now there's something for a feminist to get charged up about. What was the problem? They weren't sure this electrocution thing was going to work? Try it out on a woman first? Men are pigs.
I asked my daughter if she knew who the first American woman in space was. Yawn.
"Come on!" I said. "This is important!"
"Quit trying to teach me things on the weekend," she protested.
FOR the record, it was Sally Ride. In the space shuttle Challenger. America, which has been on the forefront of women's rights, didn't manage to get a woman into space until 1983, 20 years to the day that Russian woman with the long name went into space. That angers a feminist like me.
"Do you have any idea how many humans have stepped foot on the moon?" I asked my daughter, who stared back icily.
"Ten," I said. "Only 10 people. None of them women, by the way. Don't you think it behooves every citizen of the world to at least know the names of the 10 people who actually walked on the moon? It's not like trying to memorize the Periodic Table of Elements."
No comment.
"Well, I'm going to learn all those names, now," I said.
She looked at me strangely and left the room.
So, I don't know what the message is. All a parent can do is try, right? For the record, the names of the only 10 people to walk on the moon are: Neil Armstrong, Buzz Aldrin, Charles Conrad, Alan Bean, Alan Shepard, Edgar Mitchell, David Scott, James Irwin, John Young and Charles Duke. Cut this out and put it on your refrigerator door until you've memorized it, weekend or not.
To fellow feminists, Happy Valentina Vladimirovna Day.
Charles Memminger, winner of
National Society of Newspaper Columnists
awards in 1994 and 1992, writes "Honolulu Lite"
Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
Write to him at the Honolulu Star-Bulletin,
P.O. Box 3080, Honolulu, 96802
or send E-mail to charley@nomayo.com or
71224.113@compuserve.com.
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