By Dean Sensui, Star-Bulletin
"What's starting to kick in is this weird Al Yankovich fear,"
says Mike Piranha, who sits on the rooftop of his
Maunalani Heights home.

Livin’ it up with a
parody of paradise

Mike Piranha's
'Hotel Honolulu' gets
airplay and guffaws

By Tim Ryan
Star-Bulletin

TRAFFIC, bad drivers, high prices, dumb mainlanders, lenient judges. Ah, life in paradise isn't all pineapples and surf.

That's according to Mike Piranha, singer-songwriter of "Hotel Honolulu" -- a parody of life on Oahu written to the tune of "Hotel California" -- that's become one of the most played songs on Hawaii radio today.

The Chicago-born musician and his brother Tom -- formerly the Swinging Johnsons -- moved to Hawaii in 1992. Piranha, 44, wrote "Hotel Honolulu" in about an hour. The band recorded the song in 1996; it was mixed and finished late last year "I was sitting in sun with a note pad and thinking about all the things locals go through here on a daily basis," he said.

The popularity of the song the impetus for Mike Piranha to do an album, "Silhouette Artist," released June 1.

Piranha knows "Hotel Honolulu" is a bit low on the political-correctness scale. Take these lyrics:

"Up ahead in the distance, I saw a typical sight

"A 100-year-old Japanese man signal left and turning right"

"That...really hits with local audiences," Piranha said. "People here drive until they're 250 years old."

Or how about:

"Mirrors on the table, gang-bangers on ice

"To end up in prison here you'd have to kill someone twice."

Sometimes reality crosses political correctness lines, Piranha said.

"But one of the nice things about Hawaii is the provincial attitude about political correctness," he said. "PC hasn't gone crazy here with the ACLU breathing down your neck about everything."

"What's starting to kick in is this weird Al Yankovich fear," Piranha says, referring to the king of song satirists. "I don't want to be known only as a parody artist because I'm anything but."

Piranha emphasizes that the "real artistic work" on the album can be found in the other songs like "Our Backyard," and "Hawaiian Soul."

"I love Hawaii very, very much and the other songs reflect that," he said.

HOTEL HONOLULU From the song "Hotel California" by the Eagles Parody lyrics by M.P. McGraw On a hot island freeway cheap mousse in my hair The warm smell of Kalihi rising up through the air Up ahead in the distance I saw a typical sight A 100-year-old Japanese man signal left and turning right I got off of the freeway by the Taco Bell I was thinking to myself, "This island is going to hell." So I put on my sandals I saw the blue of the bay Thought I got to the Hilton when I heard them say Welcome to the Hotel Honolulu Such a lovely place it's a navy base We're living it up at the Hotel Honolulu We can't party here, can't afford the beer Her number used to be listed back when we were friends That was way before her implants, nose job and contact lens We used to dance in her courtyard sweet summer sweat Now she dances at Rock-Za and she's snorting her rent So I called up an old friend to see if he had some time He said, "I've been looking for a parking space here since 1989." And all my relatives call me from who knows where They wake me up in the middle of the night and ask, "What time is it there?" Welcome to the Hotel Honolulu Such a lovely place watch da geckos race We're living it up at the Hotel Honolulu Where we surf for fun but get nothing done Mirrors on the table gang-bangers on ice To end up in prison here you'd have to kill someone twice So tell the crooks on the mainland living here is so great 'Cuz no one has more lenient laws than the 50th state Last thing I remember I was calling up my bank To apply for a major loan to put some gas in my tank "Relax," said the banker, "the interest is three grand," "yeah, we learned it from the haoles who came and stole all the land." Welcome to the Hotel Honolulu Such a lovely place sunburn on da face We've run out of room at the Hotel Honolulu No more land supply so we stack 'em high