Loss of friend shouldn't bring pain to others


POSTED: Saturday, April 04, 2009

I remember a few years ago, I felt so all alone and abandoned. I lost the friendship of a person whom I held dear to my heart.

This friendship had developed over the years to a point that our mutual acquaintances often got mixed up between the both of us. Our friendship blossomed even though she is a Caucasian and I am a person of color. People would call her home and think that they were talking to me. I often got addressed as this friend and she as me.

We belonged to this great organization and shared many things in common including other friendships. We shared our families' ups and downs and our husbands' successes in this organization. There were no barriers between us. It seemed to be a God-prepared friendship. For a good many years things were just great, there couldn't be a greater friendship. We developed many mutual friends between our families.

As time went by, it seemed that a wedge started to develop between us for a variety of reasons, including discord by our mutual acquaintances. As the gap grew wider, it became such a strain and a very heavy burden only because I loved this friend so dearly. If I lost this friendship because of death, it would have been easier to bear.

During that same time there was so much turmoil at work, and I just couldn't share my innermost feelings with anyone.

Losing a best friend is so heart-wrenching. One day I just couldn't bear the sorrow any longer. I didn't know where to turn for that peace that I needed. As I was driving along to work, I remembered the lyrics of a song that was written by Emma Lou Thayne, “;Where Can I Turn for Peace.”; One line seemed particularly poignant, “;When with a wounded heart, anger or malice, I draw myself apart, searching my soul.”;

A wounded heart and anger became my constant companion. I realized that I couldn't do a thing to make it better without hurting others. I chose to pull back and just let things happen so others would not get hurt because of my loss.

I could hear in my mind a passage from the Gospel of John. Jesus said, “;Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you; not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”;

As I heard these words, I knew that I was not alone, and I could feel the comfort from the Almighty. I now have a greater appreciation for the knowledge that there is a God and all will be well.


Brevely Blas is a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Keaau Ward, Hilo, Hawaii Stake.