THE other night, I was pretending to clean out the garage when I came across my Riley Award. How couldn’t I win
the Riley Award?The good-sized plaque was serving as a makeshift table for old paint cans my family had accumulated over the years. But seeing it again got me to thinking that my invitation to this year's University of Hawaii basketball banquet must have been lost in the mail.
Surely, I deserved some consideration for the coveted Riley Award, which is bestowed by Wallace to media members who best help his team through the hard times. But when I came to the office yesterday afternoon, I learned the disturbing news -- I had been passed over for a sixth consecutive season.
Riley, what am I doing wrong? At the beginning of the season, I wrote that people shouldn't get their hopes up concerning an NCAA bid, and you went out and beat Indiana. You even had each of your players tape this newspaper masterpiece in their lockers as a constant reminder that I was on their side of the court.
A few weeks later, I wrote that you couldn't beat Kansas. And by golly, you did. Granted, neither Raef LaFrentz, arguably the best player in the land, nor fellow starter T.J. Pugh played a second.
Hmmmm. Now that I think about it, you were playing them at home in front of a maniacal sellout crowd. Tip-off was nearly tomorrow morning Kansas time. In the previous six weeks, the Jayhawks had played in New York, Chicago, Washington, D.C., Kansas City and Los Angeles. And they turned out to be the most overrated team in America. But hey, you won. Thanks to me.
Even when you lost at home to lowly San Diego State, I came to the rescue again. After the game, Anthony Carter and Alika Smith -- who weren't as gracious in defeat as victory -- were no-shows for interviews.
Our headline was something like "Batman and Robin holed up in batcave." For the next few games, the dynamic duo viewed the press as if it owed them money.
What coach doesn't like to have his star players issuing no comments. Siege mentality. Us vs. them. We against the world. Hell, it's good for business.
With all that in mind, I fully expected to be invited to the banquet to collect my second Riley Award. I even prepared my own Arnie Award list.
Originally, I planned to leak it to Wallace at the banquet so he could announce the awards before they appeared in print. But considering no invitation ever came, my column will have to do:
THE Thrown Clutch Award goes to Wallace for deciding not to call a timeout in the waning seconds of the NIT loss to Fresno State. Bulldogs head coach Jerry Tarkanian walked around the winning locker room rubbing his head and mumbling to himself, "I can't believe he didn't call time. We would have gone to a zone and they would have hit a 3-pointer to win it."
The Party of Five Award also goes to Wallace. Although Erin Galloway was the best post player on the team, he wasn't a regular member of the starting five until the 24th game of the season.
Fortunately, the league's other coaches recognized what a talent Galloway was and named him to the WAC's all-defensive team.
The Dunking Donut Award goes to Carter for his missed slam in the NIT quarterfinal loss to Fresno State. Had he made it, it would have brought down the house. Instead, it ended the season.
NIT Picking Award goes to UH athletic director Hugh Yoshida. Budget costs be damned, Yoshida coughed up nearly $400,000 to procure three home games in the NIT. Nevermind that UH's share of Utah's Final Four appearance money will net the Rainbows more than they earned in the NIT. This was still a shrewd business move.
And finally, the MVP Award goes to me. If Wu-Tang Clan's Russell Jones can cry foul for not winning a Grammy, then I can do the same for not taking home the Riley. My plaque should fit right in with the other junk in my garage.
Paul Arnett has been covering sports
for the Star-Bulletin since 1990.