Rant & Rave

Tuesday, March 10, 1998


Successful flirting is an art form

By Tara Kaneko

Tapa

SOMETIMES I wonder if I'm doing it right. You know, flirting. Am I catching the eyes of gorgeous studs or major duds?

The ways to flirt or attract guys are many and varied, depending on the situation.

Take Becky for example. She's shopping at the market and needs to pick up tampons when a cute guy walks toward her. Becky suddenly turns cherry red, her mouth drops open and her eyes bug out.

That's a no-no. Just stay calm. Every woman needs to pick up tampons some time. If this dude laughs, he's just immature and doesn't understand women.

Here's a more advanced strategy: You are a customer at Hawaiian Island Creations and the guy you're checking out is the salesclerk. Whatever you do, don't panic. Relax and breathe in and out. Browse around and look at the sale items. I'd head for the swimsuit section and start looking for one I like. I do not recommend picking a suit you don't like. He might think, "That girl has bad taste!"

When you find what you want, find your size and hide it in the upper racks behind all the others. Grab the largest size the swimsuit comes in; look at it.

(Note: Do not walk around looking for your salesclerk. You do not want some other employee to see you looking for help. It's not their help you want.)

When you see him, remember to breathe. Bump into him, but not so hard that it causes him to go flying into the clothes racks. With a cute, yet shy smile, say, "Excuse me but do you have this in a way smaller size?"

If he smiles, you're in! Start making small talk. Keep talking but don't blather. Hopefully, you'll score his name and number.

FLIRTING doesn't always work as planned. Once I was shopping with my mom when I spotted a cutie pie working at a jewelry counter. I asked to see a pair of earrings. He was staring at my mouth so I figured my lipstick must look pretty.

I talked to him and I thought things were going well. It was just fun to flirt so I didn't bother to get his number. When I left the store I got into my mom's car and looked into a mirror. There on my lip was a big piece of nori from a Spam musubi I ate for lunch. I screamed, "AHHHHH! Mom! Was this black stuff here all this time?"

My mom slyly grinned while nodding, "Yes."

"You! You knew it was there!" I screamed again. From this I learned to always check yourself after eating. You could have something wedged between your teeth or smeared on your face.

I don't think big parties are the best places to meet guys. Socializing becomes a challenge in environments where there's loud noise and drinking. Small family- and-friend gatherings are OK. The whole point of these little get- togethers is to mingle, so don't feel like you don't have a reason to talk to him. He may feel more comfortable if you do the approaching. You know how guys are, total chickens.

Sweet-smelling breath is of great importance. Nothing's worse than smelling some stench from someone's mouth. Carry some breath mints, but don't chew gum. You might be so nervous that you spit your gum onto his shirt or shoes.

Also, guys do not like whispering, giggling and pointing, just as you wouldn't like a bunch of guys pointing and giggling at you.

I hope my advice will help you in the future. I warn you though, these tips and hints are not 100 percent effective. Guys are all different.

If you feel like you're attracting duds, don't worry. Cute guys aren't always the best. They tend to have big egos. It's true that looks attract you first, but it's personality that counts in the end.



Tara Kaneko is a sophomore at Castle High School.

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