Crime news rocks in UH student paper
As an old crime reporter, I still enjoy spelunking through police blotters, and one of the most entertaining is the "Campus Beat" section of the University of Hawaii's student newspaper, Ka Leo. Yes, there is crime on the Manoa campus, but much of it seems quaint (and even mysterious) by today's standards. Here are some of my favorite "Campus Beat" items from the past year with occasional commentary from yours truly:
» "A laptop computer and a Samoan war club were stolen from the fourth floor of the Shidler College of Business." (Samoan war club? Now THAT's a tough business professor.)
» "Coconuts were stolen from the Agronomy and Soil Science facility. ... If you bought any of the stolen coconuts at the swap meet, please return for a full refund."
» "Someone had a problem with their reflection and broke the mirror in the women's restroom on the second floor of Saunders Hall. Hopefully, the new mirror will provide better reflection." (No comment.)
» A noose was found hanging from an umbrella at the Sustainability Courtyard at lunch. It was removed and taken to the Chancellor's Office. (The chancellor, no doubt, was appreciative.)
» An unidentified person stole toilet paper from the first-floor restrooms of Watanabe Hall. HPD was not notified." (HPD, do doubt, was thankful.)
» "Three male callers had nobody better to prank-call than Campus Security. The incidents were reported to HPD." (HPD, no doubt, was confused.)
» A couple involved in a 1 p.m. domestic argument at the Ka Leo building were advised to stay away from each other for 24 hours. (Wise counsel. But shouldn't HPD have been notified?)
» A visitor to campus entered a classroom at Miller Hall and told students the class was canceled. Students left, but returned when they saw the instructor. Campus Security and HPD were called. The suspect was located and cited for trespassing. (Serial class cancelers ... the newest danger on college campuses.)
» "A student reported being harassed at Saunders Hall. The suspect is a slim male, about 20 years old, 5-foot-9, with blond hair, riding a skateboard and playing a harmonica." (Sorry, it's serial skateboarding, harmonica-playing harassers that are the newest danger on college campuses.)
» "A sign and table near the Marine Science building was damaged by two men and a woman riding skateboards." (The sign allegedly said, "No Harmonica Playing.")
» "Once again someone stole the no-smoking signs from Sakamaki Hall. If you or anyone you know suddenly acquires an abundance of no-smoking signs, please notify Campus Security." (But leave HPD and the chancellor out of it.)
My thanks and admiration go out to Ka Leo staffer Michelle White, who is lucky enough to be in charge of compiling the "Campus Beat" police blotter items. Edna Buchanan, the great Pulitzer Prize-winning Miami police reporter, would be impressed.
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