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Honolulu Lite
Charles Memminger
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Lite notebook: Turtles, dogs, blind seers
Welcome to the Tuesday Lite Notebook, (Dept. of Corrections, Updates, Further Convolutions and New Business.)
Update: In January I mentioned the relatively sudden adoption by Green Sea Turtles of busy Laniakea beach on the North Shore as a place to sun and frolic (if blinking an occasional eye is considered frolicking) and that the first turtle to haul out there is named Brutus. He appeared in 1999, according to turtle biologist George Balazs, and is officially known as L-1 (Laniakea 1). I said the turtle was named Brutus by "a lady who has lived at that beach for 30 years." Some readers wanted to know who she is. She is Joanne Pettigrew, who isn't just some lady but has the Malama na Honu Foundation, dedicated to protecting and appreciating "honu," or turtles. She named L-1 Brutus because a shark bit off a chunk of his back flipper on "a blustery March 15." She probably should have name the turtle "Caesar" since HE was the one who suffered on the Ides of March at the hands of Brutus and other Roman sharks. You can see photos of Brutus (the turtle) at Pettigrew's Web site malamanahonu.org.)
Correction: Big Islander Mike Last wants people to know 1) he's from Ka'u, not Puna, as I said in a recent column and 2) He got 12 votes when he last ran for the state Legislature. I concede he's from Ka'u, but I was referring to the 1998 election in which he only got three votes. The large "up-county vote" apparently never materialized in either case.
Update: Tammy Kubo, owner of Hawaii Pet Nanny, a popular pet-sitting biz, has been letting dogs and cats "vote" in a "first ever presidential pet caucus" on her Web site, visitmypet.com. She reports that that Hillary Clinton and Barrack Obama are in heat, wait, I mean are in a DEAD HEAT, according to the poll. A few weeks ago the pet poll had Rudy Giuliani ahead on the Republican side and didn't even offer John McCain as a choice. (Shows how smart four-legged furry creatures are about presidential politics.) I noticed Tammy snuck in and put McCain in the poll and dropped Giuliani. She readily confesses that when she first posted the candidates on the site "I didn't think McCain had a chance." She thinks the islands' poi dogs will come through and give Hawaii's favorite son and (recent) pet lover Obama the win. (He didn't even own a pet at the beginning of the campaign.)
New Business: A reader alerted me to a curious obituary that appeared in "The Astrological Magazine." "We regret to announce that due to unforeseen circumstances beyond our control, the publication of The Astrological Magazine will cease." Unforeseen circumstances? You mean the publishers of a magazine devoted to seeing into the future didn't even see the coming demise of their own publication? That's almost as disturbing as Dionne Warwick, huckster for the "Psychic Friends Network," not "seeing" her singing career crashing and her becoming a shill for her not-so-psychic friends.
Buy Charles Memminger's hilarious new book, "Hey, Waiter, There's An Umbrella In My Drink!" at island book stores or
online at any book retailer. E-mail him at
cmemminger@starbulletin.com