Lessons learned

A mother of six children will claim her own bachelor's degree from UH-Manoa next week

Patricia Marie Kim-Tupinio says she always wanted to graduate from college.

But at 16 and pregnant with her first child, Kim-Tupinio put her dream on hold for more than three decades while she raised six children -- four from her first marriage and two from her second marriage.

She sent her first four children to college before deciding four years ago that it was time for her to go to school.

Next Sunday at age 52, Kim-Tupinio will finally don her cap and gown and graduate from the University of Hawaii at Manoa with a bachelor's degree in business and finance. Also graduating will be her oldest son, Wayne Colin Kim Jr., who will receive his Ph.D. in electrical engineering.

"We'll be there giving her leis, instead of her giving us leis," said eldest daughter MarthaAnn Kim, who received her bachelor's degree in family resource management from UH-Manoa.

"I cannot thank her more," said Wayne Kim. "We were young and there were six of us in the family. She sacrificed a lot to get us through."

MarthaAnn remembers her mother working three jobs as a single parent to help her children go to school.

"For me, education became everything," Kim-Tupinio said. "I couldn't give my kids money. I told them, 'I can't give you everything, but I can give you education.'"

At first, however, her children weren't inclined to go to college. Wayne drifted for several years before enrolling at Leeward Community College, Kim-Tupinio said.

"Between high school and starting college, there was some rebellious periods we all have," Wayne Kim said. "It was a hard lesson I needed to learn. I realized that mom was right."

Once at Leeward, Wayne said he gravitated toward engineering, earning his bachelor's degree at UH-Manoa in 1998, then his master's at the University of California-Los Angeles in 2001.

He and his wife, Rose, who also grew up in Hawaii and is an engineer, moved home to be closer to family after the birth of their first son.

Wayne Kim said he will teach and continue to do research on wireless communications and radar at UH-Manoa after graduation.

Wayne's success inspired older sister MarthaAnn to also enroll at Leeward.

"She (her mother) helped me with child care. When I had to study, she'd watch him (her son) for me," MarthaAnn Kim said.

Then younger brother Jonathan graduated in aeronautics and aviation at Honolulu Community College. Younger brother Christopher graduated from St. Martins University in Washington state.

Once Christopher moved away and with the other two children, Melvin and Maegan Tupinio, in middle school, Kim-Tupinio announced to the family it was her turn to go to college.

"At first we thought, 'Are you crazy? Aren't you too old for school?'" MarthaAnn said.

But college soon became a family project.

MarthaAnn and the other siblings offered advice on getting financial aid, where to park at school, what classes to take, and even helped with term papers.

"When I went back to school I was very computer illiterate," Kim-Tupinio said. She would call her son Wayne in California and ask for advice.

"I told him, 'Wayne, mommy has to write this paper,' and he would tell me to e-mail it to him and I was like, 'What is that?'"

After graduation, Kim-Tupinio said she plans to continue her education, either going to law school or the graduate business school at UH-Manoa.

MarthaAnn said her mother is an inspiration to some of her friends who also put off college to raise families.

"Friends of the family who are my age, about 36, told me: 'I can't go back now, It's too late," MarthaAnn Kim said. "I tell them: 'Look at my mom. If she can do it, you can.'"