The Goddess Speaks
The blues over flavored vodka
LORA called from Los Angeles last night on the way home from her bartending shift. She is the hardest person to reach, so you can imagine how excited I was to hear from her. I took the opportunity to ask for her opinion on the new Stolichnaya's Blueberry Vodka. "I don't really care for it," she said, "but all the guys love it!"
So it wasn't just my observation that lately, an increasing number of guys -- particularly young, single guys -- are drinking Blueberry Stoli. And as my friend rambled on, all I could think was, "Are guys unaware that sipping this drink from a red skinny mixer straw does not give off a manly image?"
When I caught Brad ordering a Blueberry/7-Up at Osake, I asked him why he chose it. He was quick with the defensive response, "Because it tastes good." On second thought, maybe guys are aware.
Don't get me wrong, drink whatever you want; we all have our drink of choice. My friend Kristi will only drink Tanqueray/tonic because alcohol and tonic water contain fewer calories than the average mixed drink, and she likes flaunting her skin-tight jeans. My neighbor Taryn always drinks Captain Morgan because, unlike other alcoholic beverages, it doesn't give her a headache. My co-worker Evan loves champagne because it's clean-tasting and he "likes to celebrate."
STILL, I'M perplexed how guys like my friend Jared, a CPA, will settle down with a Blueberry Stoli after a long day of punching numbers, instead of an ice-cold beer. You would think that David, an attorney who works 80 hours a week, would crave a nice glass of wine. Even John, who works at his nightclub until the wee hours of the morning and can drink anything from his well-stocked bar, would want something like Courvoisier or Gran Patron Platinum. Yet their drink of choice is Blueberry Stoli.
I've tried it. It's good, but not that good. Not good enough for me to switch to a flavored vodka. Maybe Blueberry Stoli is a trend I haven't caught onto yet. I still don't understand the obsession with leggings.
I don't care how guys drink it -- on the rocks, with soda water or 7-Up -- it's still not manly. And guys who absolutely insist on drinking this frou-frou drink, please take out the red straw and sip it from the glass. Otherwise, you might as well sport your pink shirt and tell the bartender to make you a Cosmopolitan -- at least then you'll match the color of your drink.
Lauren Chang is a full-time Star-Bulletin/MidWeek ad staffer, part-time vodka connoisseur.
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