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Gathering Place
Sunny Massad
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Live better -- get rid of those toxic influences
Life does not have to be a struggle or a drama. Of course we each take our turn at having to confront difficult challenges that life poses, but how we respond to those challenges determines whether we sail through them with a feeling of ease or whether we allow fear and worry to throw us off balance. It requires a juggling act to maintain your balance while attempting to function well mentally, physically, emotionally, financially and spiritually.
Working long hours to stay on the cutting edge can be exhausting. Is it possible to stay on the cutting edge without sacrificing your soul? Yes. It is not only possible, it is crucial to the quality of your day-to-day life. It requires a transformation in your perspective so that your life will feel more like an adventurous journey than a continuous uphill climb. It is possible to live a life in awe and wonder at the miracles of life all around you, to experience deep joy, and to become free from the anxiety and neurosis that plague so many in these hectic times.
The human spirit is resilient. You can, you have and you will continue to cope with and survive seemingly insurmountable obstacles in your life. But to experience grace in your life requires an attitude of gratitude that puts all of the painful experiences of your past into a category of "lessons that you've learned." If you are carrying toxic resentment about a person or an event, consider forgiving your past, not because the offenses were forgivable but because the hurt and resentment are so toxic to yourself. It keeps you stuck and only you can liberate yourself from your own suffering.
You have a right to be happy regardless of the miserable people who might be involved in your life. But happiness is an inside. It will require you to make a change in your attitude and maybe even your behavior. Hold your head up high, dust yourself off and start all over again. It's your life and you deserve it!
Sunny Massad, Ph.D., is a wellness counselor in private practice and a teacher of peer counseling at the Hawaii Wellness Institute (
hawaiiwellnessinstitute.org).