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The Goddess Speaks
By Debra Evans
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Circle of pals turning 50 and loving it
MY GIRLFRIENDS and I are in the midst of a most exciting time in our lives. We are about to turn 50 and remain as rambunctious as ever.
There's something special about turning an age with a zero in it, and 50 -- well, I'd say that's pretty momentous. It's a fact that today's 50 is quite different from what it was in our mother's time, and during Grandma's time -- well, that's another universe entirely.
Today, most women look 10 years younger, and many women about to turn 50 still look pretty darn good and nowhere near what the age sounds like.
A great part of aging in today's society has to do with attitude: how you see and imagine yourself, what you have evolved into and -- in the end -- to be damn proud of it all.
It's walking into a room and not giving a heck what other people think. So you want to wear your favorite red scarf wrapped around your neck over a white T-shirt just to do some grocery shopping. So you don a fabulous vintage hat that you picked up at your favorite boutique and head out the door. If you've got attitude, you will shine and be drop-dead gorgeous!
ONE OF the perks of being "old" is that we've earned the right to do outrageous things. With child-rearing and nightly full-on meal preparation pretty much over, after spending years of putting ourselves last, it's our time to let our hair down. To color it, bleach it or chop it all off. To do those things that we started out doing and had to put aside in order to raise our families. Attend the symphony, to laugh and have wine at lunch with the girls, to hold hands with our husbands when we go out. (Oh, I can just see my 16-year-old son rolling his eyes!)
The girls and I have decided that now more than ever, attitude is everything. It's what keeps us anticipating what the future holds. It's what makes us dream of what we want to be when we "finally" grow up. It's what draws us into stores like Betsey Johnson's and those little boutiques where you find clothing that is just a little inside of outrageous.
We are, after all, going to be 50, and there is some decorum and grace that we still want to retain. But deep inside, lurking beneath all of that, is a swirling pool of attitude, ready to wash up to the surface at a moment's notice.
The curtain might have dropped on Act 1, but hold on to your attitude, girls -- we'll need it for Act 2. According to my already 50-something friends, that's where the real fun begins!
Debra Evans is a Hawaii-based writer.
The Goddess Speaks is a feature column by and about women. If you have something to say, write "The Goddess Speaks," 7 Waterfront Plaza, Suite 210,
Honolulu 96813 or e-mail
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