In dad's footsteps

Her father's memories guide Rhani Kaneaiakala on and off the court

AFTER PLAYING in a preseason game last month, Kamehameha forward Rhani Kaneaiakala broke down in tears. And the reason had nothing to do with basketball.

On the court following the game against Moanalua, a woman approached her, and with one simple compliment touched on a subject the 5-foot-8 sophomore, described by teammates and friends as very open and outspoken, still has a hard time talking about.

"She said, 'Your father would be so proud of you,' " said her mother, Tammy Kaneaiakala. "The next day (Rhani) just cried and cried."

Her whole life Rhani Kaneaiakala has had to face tough questions. When she was 2, she wondered why her dad wasn't picking her up from preschool. In grade school, she dealt with the pain of not having anyone to give her Father's Day card to. Now, the 15-year-old still internally faces the heartbreaking question of why her dad isn't up in the stands, cheering her on.

"He was such an outstanding person," Tammy said of her late husband Clifford Kaneaiakala Jr. "And for her not to have known him, it just makes it hard for her ... I still see in her the searching."

When Rhani was 10 months old, the father who had devoted all of his free time to her, was suddenly gone. On a rainy night that marked his 27th birthday, he was involved in a fatal motorcycle accident.

In that moment, Tammy became a single mom, and Rhani lost a father she would never know.

"I hear a lot of stories about him from other people," said Rhani. "I hear a lot of athletic stories and about how he was a good person.

"I see other people's views of him. But sometimes, I feel like I just want my own."

"It's hard for me to explain to her how good he was," Tammy said. "And I made a promise to him at his funeral that I would never let her forget."

A CELEBRATED ATHLETE at Kaiser in the early 1980s, Cliff made headlines his senior year, breaking six state records during the 1981 football season. After graduation, the ex-quarterback returned to coach at his alma mater and began dating Tammy Kanoa, a former multi-sport standout for the Cougars, who had also come back to coach at Kaiser.

Within a span of three years, Tammy became a wife, a mother, then a widow.

"They don't ever bring it up," said fellow Kamehameha starter Tatri Lorenzo. "Probably most of (her teammates) don't even know."

Though she has no memory of him, Rhani has constant reminders of her father.

"You know how teenagers have all these celebrities on their walls? I have pictures of my dad playing football and newspaper articles, so I see him every day," Rhani said.

"Some people think it's silly, 'cause he's not there, and they get to see their dad. But I wake up every morning and say, 'Good morning, Dad.' "

Aside from visuals and stories, Rhani needs to look no farther than her own name to find a connection to her father. Though she has never met him, Rhani was named after one of her father's teammates and best friends, Rhani Peters.

Just the mention of Peters brings up even more stories -- the spectacular plays on the field and on the court, the potlucks with family and friends, the nights spent in the Kaneaiakala garage just hanging out after games.

IT IS THROUGH her family that Rhani gets to know her father and the life he led. And it is because of her close ties to her grandparents and mother that has helped her cope.

"My mom has always supported me," Rhani said. "My grandpa, he's the closest person to me, more than my mom."

"She looks up in the crowd, got all fathers," Clifford Kaneaiakala Sr. said. "Her mom is a rock, the foundation ... I just tell her, 'That's who you really need to be thankful for.' "

When she needed someone to talk to about the incident at Moanalua, Rhani turned to Grandpa.

"When she cries to someone, it's Grandpa," Tammy said. "There are things she won't tell me, but she'll tell him."

But when it comes to basketball, her mom, grandparents and father have all molded her into what is now: a starting forward for the Warriors.

Rhani, now in her second year on the varsity, is called the "bully" on the squad by head coach Clay Cockett for her size and aggressiveness on the court. That toughness comes most obviously from her family's encouragement and forms of tough love.

"Whenever I'd have a bad game, no matter what time it is, school night, weekend, (my mom would) always take me to the court, push me around, make me tougher on the inside," Rhani said of Tammy, the first-year coach of the Kamehameha girls junior varsity squad. "Back then I didn't like it, but now I realize how big of an impact (it had on) me."

And despite his soft-hearted, caring presence, Grandpa Kaneaiakala didn't cut Rhani any slack, either.

"WHEN I GET HURT, while most parents would be all goody-goody about it, he would just look at me and tell the refs leave me alone, and tell me to get up," she said.

Last season was a tough one for Rhani. She missed half the season because she was put on academic probation. But again her family helped her to toughen up and get help. This year, she proudly declares that she's doing better, and is eligible as the Warriors begin the Interscholastic League of Honolulu season.

But the impact of her father's memory, and perhaps his genes, also strongly guides Rhani both on and off the court.

"You know that nature-vs.-nurture debate? I've got to be an advocate for nature," Tammy said. "She has a lot of his traits.

"There's no doubt she is her father's child. A lot of his personality is in her."

In addition to similarly peculiar eating habits, like putting ketchup on everything, Cliff and Rhani share much more important characteristics.

At a mere 5-foot-9, Cliff had to work hard to become an accomplished athlete.

That drive is something Cliff Sr. also sees in his granddaughter.

"Every game I would play, my grandpa and grandma would always talk and tell me how much I remind them of him," said Rhani.

"I know he's watching me," she added, "but I need to have my mom and my grandpa watching me, too.

"If I don't, I don't play well."