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Sidelines
Kalani Simpson
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Pro coaches bring Pro Bowl game plan
THESE two guys were defensive coordinators in the NFL?
Come on. That's a typo, right? I don't believe it. Not after last night. So much for the Steel Curtain. Somebody just rubbed an entire jar of Flex-All all over the House of Pain.
What is this, tennis? Has rally scoring hit another sport?
What is this, the NBA?
New Mexico State's secondary looked like something right out of the Old West. A lot of wide-open spaces.
It was like lunch recess, and Hawaii's Ryan Grice-Mullen was the fastest kid in the fourth grade.
It was like an after-school special down at the park, and New Mexico State's Hal Mumme was that kid with the devilish grin drawing up plays in the dirt.
Maybe that was the difference. Maybe, draped in that white towel, Mumme just gives off that strange mad-scientist vibe.
It was actually fun, last night's layup line of a football game. I didn't think it would be, but it was enjoyable, it actually was.
It sounded interminable, two crazy teams that pass, pass, pass.
People always talk about how exciting passing is. Well, sometimes. Pass every down and it tends to lose a little of the thrill.
There are few things more yawn-inducing than 5-yard out after 5-yard out, tougher to watch than a wide-receiver screen gone wrong, rougher than sitting through hours of stopped clock after stopped clock.
But this was different.
There was Mumme, stunning Hawaii fans with two fake punts that actually worked.
(And also running a fake punt when he knew that we knew that everybody knew he was going to run a fake punt -- as he and Hawaii defensive coordinator Jerry Glanville each had a full timeout to huddle up with their guys on what was about to happen next. UH's Lamar Broadway stuffed it. Bravo. What a build-up. What a chess match. What a play.)
Who knew? June Jones' dream game was a good time after all.
Back and forth. Forth and back. Jones didn't call a run until the fourth quarter. Hawaii's receivers were running wild.
And Hawaii did apply some defensive pressure with some adjustments in the second half. OK. Maybe this Glanville guy's résumé really does check out.
A good time was had by 24,775. (Although when you can't crack 30,000 -- 29,002 -- in tickets issued, that's cause for concern. But for now let's think happy thoughts.)
This is a balloon game, of course. Everything is inflated. Is Hawaii really this unstoppable? Against New Mexico State, yes.
And these Aggies -- 0-7 now -- who came in averaging 12 points a game, went up and down the field on UH.
But that's fine. Feel good. Hawaii did what it needed, got what it wanted. Sometimes a little self-esteem is just what the doctor ordered, and San Jose State is up next.
It was fun while it lasted. Dick Tomey isn't going to air it out like this.