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Alo-Ha! Friday
Charles Memminger






Kamehameha ruling
won’t stand for long

All those people going apoplectic over a federal appeals court ruling against Kamehameha Schools' Hawaiian-preference admissions policy should take a deep breath and relax. The ruling isn't going to stand.

The 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals is the largest and most liberal federal appeals court in the country. It covers 11 states and has 20 judges. Only two out of a three judge panel ruled against Kamehameha Schools. That ruling can be appealed to the entire court, and the court's liberal leanings will show themselves.

Just remember, this is the court that ruled the Pledge of Allegiance was unconstitutional. That ruling was overturned, too.

Now the news ...

Suit over flying sharks

SYDNEY, Australia (BBC) » An Australian woman is suing the Sydney Aquarium after a giant exhibition tank exploded, showering her with glass -- and sharks.

The accident left Hazel Swinden, 61, in chest-high water and badly gashed from the flying glass. One moment she was admiring reef sharks and the next she was surrounded by them, blood pouring from a deep cut. She claims to have suffered post-traumatic stress as a result.

(Out of professional courtesy, her lawyer also is representing the sharks who said they were watching an annoying fat woman one moment and then flying through the air at her the next.)

This robbery a scream

OSLO, Norway (AP) » Two masked thieves stormed into an Oslo hotel and stole what they thought were Edvard Munch paintings.

Police said the paintings were only photocopies, replacing the originals after the theft of two Munch masterpieces from an Oslo museum last year. The photocopy robbers were never caught.

(Making matters worse for the clueless robbers, they sold the stolen photo copies for counterfeit money.)

Breathless for teeth

TAIPEI, Taiwan (AP) » A Taiwanese man is breathing easier after a surgeon removed a missing set of dentures from one of his bronchial tubes -- three years after he lost them in a fall.

Surgeon Chen Chun-lei said the 45-year-old man appeared at his clinic complaining of shortness of breath. An X-ray showed the stuck dentures. The doctor said the man had not suffered breathing problems before because the dentures had not completely blocked the air passage.

(But eating corn-on-the-cob for those three years was problematic.)

Honolulu Lite on Sunday:

Was the court ruling against Kamehameha Schools "white racism," as some charge? Tune in Sunday to find out why there's plenty of blame to go around, including from the Hawaiian community.

Quote Me On This:

"The court was not previously aware of the prisoner's many accomplishments. In view of these, we see fit to impose the death penalty." -- Quentin Crisp.


See the Columnists section for some past articles.

Charles Memminger, winner of National Society of Newspaper Columnists awards, appears Tuesdays, Thursdays , Fridays and Sundays. E-mail cmemminger@starbulletin.com



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