RICHARD WALKER / RWALKER@STARBULLETIN.COM Former Hawaii first lady Jean Ariyoshi.

A public life

Jean Ariyoshi’s new book tells
of life as a political wife

No one is ever given a manual for the thankless task of becoming a public servant, but even worse is learning the ropes after marrying one. It's one thing to choose to live under a magnifying glass; it's another to fall in love with a person who brings along about a million watchdogs.

COURTESY ARIYOSHI FAMILY William Shigeki Hayashi, Jean Ariyoshi's father, a professional photographer, took many portraits of her as a child. "Washington Place, A First Lady's Story" By Jean Hayashi Ariyoshi (Japanese Cultural Center of Hawaii, hardcover, 200 pages, $35)

For everyone able to adapt to the new lifestyle, there are others who falter famously. Wives of politicians and statesmen often find themselves vulnerable to criticism for everything from hairstyle and dress to their opinions. It's hard to believe, but more than 40 years since the women's liberation movement, mass America still doesn't take kindly to outspoken women such as Hillary Rodham Clinton and Teresa Heinz Kerry, and one can't help but look back on the experiences of Princess Diana and Sarah Ferguson without thinking someone should have warned them of the pitfalls of marrying princes.

Which makes former first lady of Hawaii Jean Ariyoshi's story all the more amazing, when 30 years ago she navigated the same treacherous terrain, carrying off the job with aplomb.

"There is no course or any book to prepare you for this role," she said on the lanai of her Nuuanu home. "I tried to do my best. I went with my interests and my principles, and that guided me along as to what kind of first lady I was going to be.

"I love travel, I love history and the arts, and I believe in volunteerism and wanted to promote it, so all of these projects fell into place, and of course my aim was to make Washington Place a home all of Hawaii could be proud of."

She's written a book about her experiences, "Washington Place, A First Lady's Story," and will begin a series of book signings tomorrow. Even today, she remains accountable to her public responsibilities. Though nursing a bout with the flu during this interview on Thursday, she had no intention of shirking the public appearances that had been planned for months, fretting instead about going to her doctor and begging him to make her well again in a matter of days. The first signing takes place tomorrow at the Japanese Cultural Center of Hawaii. Sponsorships for printing allow for 100 percent of sales to benefit JCCH, Bishop Museum, the Queen Liliuokalani Children's Center and Washington Place Foundation.

Ariyoshi first stepped foot into Washington Place on Dec. 3, 1974, after the inauguration of her husband, George, as governor. With them came George's mother, Mitsue, and the couple's three children: Lynn, then 17; Ryozo, 15; and Donn, 13. The family would spend 12 years there, and after leaving it was Jean's friend Joan Bickson who suggested she write a book about her experiences.

"I just laughed at her," she said, but in 1995, when the centennial of Washington Place came up, she gathered other former first ladies to plan a celebration. "After going back to the house and reminiscing and hearing their stories, I realized I had a story to tell, too. At first I thought I would do a pictorial album with a few vignettes, but then the book got hold of me and it became an album of stories."

As it turns out, the book is an interesting mix of history about the mansion and those who contributed to its creation, plus a personal account perfect for society's current fascination with "reality" experiences. It shows what happens when a local family is whisked into the fishbowl of public life.

It's an easy read thanks to Ariyoshi's breezy, folksy narrative style, and should be fun for social voyeurs as various international figures and local movers and shakers pass through the family's life and home.

COURTESY ARIYOSHI FAMILY The Ariyoshi family's first official photograph at Washington Place, taken in 1974, shows, left, Gov. George Ariyoshi, left, Jean and children Lynn, Ryozo and Donn.

One of the Ariyoshis' first tasks was to play host to the queen of England, after a mere four days' notice.

"Well, my reaction turned from ecstasy to panic. I had started restoration of the palace, and the house was not decorated. I just did the best that I could.

"The good thing was, I was thrown into it so quickly. I just thought, if we could do this, we could do anything. I'm glad I had that experience, because after that it was duck soup."

Entertaining royalty and heads of state was a tall order for a self-confessed "country girl" from Wahiawa, who grew up wearing slips sewn from rice bags, but she said adapting to her new role in supporting her husband and adopting his family motto, "okagesama-de" ("because of you"), in service to family and the public, came easily.

"I loved entertaining and spent a lot of time and effort entertaining these officials. It was good for Hawaii, and good for America because this was their first stop on the way to Washington, D.C., and gave them their first impression of our nation."

It was a unique time when the limitations of air travel made it necessary for travelers to stop in Hawaii en route from Asia. China was opening up to America, and trade was growing with Japan. The Ariyoshis welcomed everyone from Chinese Premier Deng Xiaoping to Japan's Emperor Hirohito.

"A lot of social graces is common sense. You always have to put yourself in your guest's position and feel for them and watch their body English. It came easily to me because I'm a sensitive person, and that, to me, was it all -- common sense."

She could always call consular offices for matters of protocol and preferences, but even then, she said, the information could be wrong. In Deng's case they learned that lamb is his favorite food. He was served lamb everywhere he traveled in the United States, and by the time he met up with George Ariyoshi again at a governor's dinner in Georgia, he told Ariyoshi, "Americans must really like lamb."

COURTESY ARIYOSHI FAMILY When Kiribati gained its independence from Great Britain in 1979, Ariyoshi celebrated with some of the new nation's children.

Jean Ariyoshi was born to Shizue and William Shigeki Hayashi. Her father was a photographer, which might have prepared her for a life in front of the camera. She attended Leilehua High School, and because money was scarce by the time she reached college age, she attended the University of Hawaii at Manoa, intending to major in secondary education. Today, she believes that was fate. Had she gone to a mainland school, she never would have met George at a party in 1952. By then the lawyer from Kalihi already seemed to have a promising future in politics. They married two years later.

Many would feel uncomfortable living in a place with as much history as Washington Place, home to Queen Liliuokalani until she was taken into custody in 1895. They would feel haunted by the William Cogswell painting of the queen, whose eyes seem to follow visitors everywhere, but Ariyoshi said she always looked at the queen as a source of comfort.

"It was a very spiritual experience. I would kneel at the queen's portrait and talk to her. I always felt her presence in the home. I always felt the queen was looking after the first family. She was the inspiration for all the projects I did for the home.

"The queen loved people and she loved children, so I opened the home to the public, and while we were there the house was filled with laughter and music and children. The house was alive, and I know that made her happy.

"Even after I left, I would go down to the Royal Mausoleum on her birthday. I really felt like a friend to her."

Washington Place is now a museum, with a new home built for the governor on the grounds.

COURTESY ARIYOSHI FAMILY Jean and George Ariyoshi celebrate his election as lieutenant governor in November 1970.

IN THE FOREWORD to the book, Ariyoshi claims to have kept no diary during her years at Washington Place. Yet the book is rich with details, thanks to notes, photos and snippets of paper stored away in boxes that moved with the family when they left the governor's mansion.

"I had to open boxes that hadn't been open since we left Washington Place, and some that were unopened when we left our old house at Kawananakoa Place in 1971. There were all these little pieces of paper: notes, menus, post cards, newspaper clippings and lots of pictures.

"It was such a wonderful feeling to reminisce and go through all those memories that came back. The writing and research took a lot of hard work, considering my last major writing was for English composition class at the university, but it was a good kind of work. I really enjoyed it."

One of the book's strengths lies in Ariyoshi's candidness in discussing troubles as well. She's candid in talking about the difficulties of leaving Washington Place and returning to civilian life.

"It was a big jolt to go back, to have to drive again, to cook, to iron. On top of that, George's mother was in a wheelchair and needed a lot of care, and I felt like a mountain had fallen on me and I was trying to dig myself out.

"I hope that my book, in some way, will help others regarding family values. It gives insight as to what first families go through, and as tough as it is, if you want to make it work, you make it work."

And it always helps to be agreeable. Ariyoshi never questioned her husband's decisions and never imposed herself in the realm of policy-making.

"I'm the type of person who doesn't like to go against; I like to go with the flow. I don't like confrontation; I like mediation. I think my personality was good for George and politics.

"I never once forgot that I was there because of George, and I never regretted having a public life. I just embraced it and said I'm going to make the most of it. I think you have to think positive in life, otherwise you don't accomplish anything."

Book signings

For information, call 945-7633:

Tomorrow: Japanese Cultural Center of Hawaii, 2465 S. Beretania St., 4 to 5 p.m.

Nov. 30: Borders, Waiakea Center, Hilo, noon to 1:30 p.m.

Dec. 1: Borders, 75-1000 Henry St., Kona, noon to 1:30 p.m.

Dec. 4: Borders, 4303 Nawiliwili Road, Lihue, noon to 1:30 p.m.

Dec. 5: Borders, Maui Marketplace, Kahului, noon to 1:30 p.m.

Dec. 15: Borders, Ward Centre, 6 to 7 p.m.

Dec. 16: Na Mea Hawai'i, 851 Fort St., noon to 2 p.m.

Dec. 17: Borders, Waikele Center, 6 to 7 p.m.

Dec. 18: Native Books/Na Mea Hawai'i, Ward Warehouse, noon to 2 p.m.

Jan. 9: New Year's Ohana Festival at JCCH, 11 a.m. to 1 p.m.