Honolulu Lite
From waving signs to flapping wings to boiling hog heads, we have a lot of ground to cover on "Mix Plate Monday," so let's get it on. ‘Mix Plate Monday’
serves up oddities>> E-mailer Jan Nakamura writes, "I have heard from a friend that there was a Mr. Charles Memminger who might be able to answer the following question: What is the origin of the expression 'hog cheese'? While at camp over the Memorial Day weekend, someone said, 'Don't hog-cheese the marshmallows.'"
It's a bit insulting that someone would think that simply because a phase contains the words "hog," "cheese" and "marshmallows" that I would have some inside info about what it means. How come nobody ever asks if I know the meaning of a phrase containing the words "svelte," "wheat grass" and "granola bars"?
Anyway, I have no idea what "don't hog-cheese the marshmallows" might mean, although it sounds suspiciously like the 1960s dope phrase "don't Bogart that joint, my friend."
The Internet sheds no light on the phrase, although there are several recipes available for "hoghead cheese," a nasty, glutinous mess made from boiling hog heads and feet that apparently passes as food in some Southern states.
So, any readers out there with information about "hog cheese" or a like-sounding phrase, please e-mail me.
>> Scientists may have inadvertently discovered a great way to combine gambling and protecting endangered species. A project currently is under way involving light-bellied Brent geese, who migrate this time of year from Ireland to arctic Canada. Several of the geese have been tagged this year with satellite transmitters.
You can track their progress at www.wwt.org.uk/brent.
At the time of this writing, Oscar (the tagged geese have names) had gotten bogged down in Iceland while Austin and Hugh were tearing across northern Canada. Now, just think how cool it would be if you could place bets on which bird would cross the finish line first. A whole new field of gambling related to migrating whales, birds, dingos ... whatever, would increase interest in endangered species while pumping money into environmental organizations and providing degenerate bettors a worthwhile outlet for their affliction.
>> The City Council's plan to regulate political sign waving seems flawed. Under the plan, no sign-wavers would be allowed near intersections. The bill apparently is to keep drivers from crashing into each other while looking at signs instead of the car in front of them, which is laudable. But by moving the sign-wavers away from the intersections, it just makes THEM that much harder to hit. I say, anyone intentionally distracting automobile drivers, especially for political gain, should be willing to dive into a ditch or behind a light pole from time to time to avoid getting run over.
Charles Memminger, winner of National Society of Newspaper Columnists awards, appears Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays and Sundays. E-mail cmemminger@starbulletin.com